I am working with a mother who is arranging a private adoption.  The baby
has to be in foster care for 2 weeks. The adoptive mother has been working
on a milk supply for 3 months and has several bottles frozen and can pump
about 1/2 ounce of milk at a time. She has her supplementing device and is
set to go.

The foster mother called an LC who suggested that she feed the baby at the
breast with a tube for the 2 weeks she has him/her so that the transfer to
Mom's breast will be smoother.  The foster mother is agreeable to this.
The adoptive mother called me to see if I think that it would be an added
loss to the infant if he/she bonds with the foster mother more closely
because of breastfeeding.

I asked the mother what *she* feels about this other woman feeding her
baby. She said that, at first, she felt a pang of jealousy, then came to
the place that if it hastened her baby's coming to her breast, she would
gladly accept it. Also, she can visit the foster home during the 2 weeks
and would be able to feed her baby.

I have several thoughts.  One is that a baby would do well to not be
"without a mother" for 2 weeks, and that a close attachment to the foster
mother would be an enhancement of his/her attachment to the mother after
the 2 weeks.

The birth mother has invited the adoptive mother to come to the hospital
and feed the baby also. So one thought is that it would be what would be
done in a more "natural" culture if a mother of a newborn was very ill and
some relative who was lactating would feed the baby until the mother could
do so.

I wanted to get some ideas from those of you have adopted or have worked
with a similar case as this one, or from those of you who have opinions and
insight into this issue.

Pat Gima, IBCLC
Milwaukee, Wisconsin

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