Wow! Linda, you really hit my sore spot too. The last place I expected to
get really honest and helpful feedback for my church  mission was on
LACTNET. In a moment (depending of your reading speed and tenacity in
following my rambling) I have an apology to, a question for,  and a
challenge for, all who read this.

Back to the post:  I'm on the other side.  I'm one of those " organized
religion types." Many of the 'old-timers of  LACTNET''s and probably all of
the  200 plus new members since I came on are probably unaware of my
different history from most of you. I'm the senior priest of an Episcopal
Church, ordained in early 1970s, who feels so strongly about health care,
maternal/infant issues, etc. that I've started my own Home Health Agency and
a supplemental employee benefit program to meet the needs.  Some stuff I
didn't put in my intro: I'm 59, married with 2 sons & d-in-l's with 5
grandchildren. 2nd son's children have breast fed. Even have a picture of 2
yr old gnd-dtr nursing her doll (threw the bottle away incidentally -for
those following the doll track)

In 1975, when I was an assistant at Res, we built our "new" sanctuary. As a
very family oriented church we debated how to handle infants. *The mothers*
wanted the privacy of the "cry room."  It has rockers, cribs, changing
tables with (odor-eater diaper pails),  a full bath-room where babies can
even be bathed, a enough floor for toddler'ss to play. I came back 14 years
later to a graying congregation that's now seeing an explosion of  nesting
age families.(church lingo). It's now the "contentment room" and is heavily
used by mothers, fathers, and grandmothers. Note the exclusion of
grandfathers. Those of my generation in my neck of the woods were "taught"
that raising babies was a female job. Dad took over when they developed some
personality and an ability to communicate. The M's, Fs. and GM's still *ask*
to use the room.  The point? This is a generational thing and a cultural
thing! The *slowest* place--sadly--that these things change is in the church.

But we've made a breakthrough in recent years! About half of the new mothers
are nursing (*I* still like the word even after so many e-mails about what
to call it.).   . The break-through? Our new mothers are now nursing during
service!  One of our lead musicians plays with his new son in a cradle
carrier on his back, his daughter playing at his feet, and his wife (when
she's not at the keyboard)  Our deacon (a widower) and his new wife (an
ex-school teacher) just had a baby, and she is very unself-conscious as she
bf's. Our parish nurses (a church program of health education) and my agency
nurses who are members of our parish provide a lot of teaching and
encouragement to those new moms, including permission to bf in public. I do
want to make a caveat. We do ask for some degree of discretion after one
mother pulled her blouse open and was nursing both sides exposed. Much of
the church was terribly embarrased. The real disruption, though, was the
children who wanted to watch!

Many of the new non-denomination churches (called seeker-friendly in church
jargon) not only allow natural family life, but strongly encourage it.
Sadly, most main line churches are still too up tight.

Now the wrap-up: To Linda--and to any whom the church has offended--accept
my apologies for the stream of the church I represent. Forgive us, and help
us gray-beared old fossels  understand your needs. None of the dozens of
church surveys we do with new visitors has elicited such candor as your
posting. Just like the medical community (see any parallels?) we need educating!

Question: How can we go about doing what you ask?

Challenge: If bf ever becomes the norm in the church, tradition becomes an
ally not an enemy. Keep up the good work and don't give up on us.! Even with
all my natural interest, it took a bf nurse to educate me. Find one of the
seeker-friendly churchs and target the  pastor with love, prayer, and much
information about changing *back* to traditional ways. (That'll blow some
minds.!)

The facitious answer to your theological questions: 1) By bottle using abm
(but being the King's son they had the finest, most natural nipples on the
bottles. 2) No longer that society approved of (he and his mother were
always social climbers). 3) in private, of course. Don't want to offend the
public. and 4) Scripture doesn't say, but since a c-section is so much
quicker and less painful, that's my guess.
>:-)  :-)  :-)



Richard G."Dick" Copeland
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