----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Mary-Jane Sackett" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Saturday, September 18, 2010 4:23 PM
Subject: [LACTNET] "Exclusively Breastfed" and getting a bottle of 
breastmilk


**Hello Mary,

> But I am saddened when a  mother feels breastfeeding must be
> an "all or nothing" situation. I  routinely tell mothers that one does not
> have to be a martyr to nurse a baby.  They can have a life too! So many
> mothers have so much misinformation about the  do's and don'ts of 
> breastfeeding,
> that some won't even consider it because they  feel they can't "have a 
> life
> and nurse."

**I am saddened, too, because what you say, implies that 'nursing a baby' 
and 'having a life of your own' are incompatible. It also implies that 
nursing is something that requires serious suffering (definition of 'martyr' 
from the Free Dictionary: "One who makes great sacrifices or suffers much in 
order to further a belief, cause, or principle.").
I want to strongly object to this and I must say that I feel that it is 
exactly IBCLC's, with all the knowledge they (are supposed to) have, who 
should be the ones to not validate such views.
Apart from all the knowledge and expertise we have to share, we need to play 
the advocacy role on baby's behalf in order to enable a societal paradigm 
shift.
Children don't want their parents to be martyrs while caring for them; 
children need their parents to enjoy being a witness to seeing them grow up 
and thrive, from the child's first hour until the parents' last hour. 
Whatever happened to motherhood being a joy...?

Bye,

Marianne Vanderveen IBCLC, Netherlands 

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