>Debbie, but the problem is that the mother I worked with thought that her
>baby needed the ritual and the schedule, almost more than the FOOD. Baby
>was not gaining. Mother is TERRIFIED to leave off the schedule, as it might
>disturb the baby's need for predictability.
>
>Kathleen


Good insight....I agree, some mothers think they *are* truly meeting
their baby's needs by scheduling,  and denying food and drink and
comfort to them. There is a fear of 'over-feeding' - so the clock is
watched and the baby prevented from taking what he 'asks' at the
breast, because the mother thinks this is 'bad' for him.

These are among the mothers I find most challenging...they also want
their babies to grow and thrive, but not at the expense of ditching
the schedule.

I think it is especially hard for volunteer counsellors (like me) who
want to be mother-centred, and to help mothers 'meet their feeding
goals' without being directive or prescriptive, and to feel able to
support mothers almost whatever they do.

What *did* you write to this mother, Kathleen, when you told her 'the facts'??

Heather Welford Neil
NCT bfc Newcastle upon Tyne UK

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