Heather, it looks as if the time is here to write your article.

Besides all the other baby-ignoring behaviour of today (which would rival 
the old "be seen and not heard" era), you can add prams (strollers, baby 
buggies) that face away from the adult. So often I see a baby or older baby 
squirming and trying to turn to see Mum, and unable to, sometimes even 
crying. Hearing her voice isn't enough. The adult also can't see when the 
sun is in the baby's eyes, awful for a very young aby who can't turn away. 
When I see parents using a baby buggy or pram where the baby faces them, I 
make a point of congratulating them on their good sense.

Virginia
in Brisbane, QLD, Australia

----- Original Message ----- 
From: "heather" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Friday, November 15, 2013 8:49 PM
Subject: Re: competing attention


> Nikki, as part of my other life as a journalist, I interviewed a 
> specialist in early infant relationships, and she raised this issue 
> spontaneously with me (my article was not really 'about' the aspect of 
> what-gets-in-the-way so I couldn't report on it, but it is in my mind to 
> do something).
>
> She took it very seriously indeed. Her concern was not just the very early 
> days but afterwards. She notes that parents are looking at phones all the 
> time. ALL THE TIME.  The baby/toddler is in the room, or being pushed 
> along in the pram/pushchair. It becomes more difficult for the parent to 
> respond normally and naturally and to interact with the child, because 
> their attention is just not  piqued.
>
> It is very difficult to do anything about this, without sounding like Old 
> Grandma Grumpy from Grumpyville who is critical of everything modern, and 
> especially today's mothers.
>
> There have been concerns expressed, and confirmed by research, related to 
> excessive use of TV, and the effect on cognition and relationships - but 
> handheld devices are *worse* because they are always there, in a pocket or 
> a bag, or indeed in the hand.
>
> I am not all that bothered by people taking snaps immediately after the 
> birth - that's always happened. And even posting to Facebook takes only a 
> few seconds.  But beyond that, it's just *too much*.
>
> Heather Welford Neil
> NCT bfc, tutor, UK
>
>
>>Dear Lactnet Friends:
>>
>>I am hearing the same lament from many maternity staff people, including
>>breastfeeding helpers, in the US.
>>
>>The lament is that mothers care more, and interact more, with their
>>handheld devices than they do with their new babies. Women are posting
>>Facebook photos from the delivery room table, instead of staring at their
>>babies.
>>
>>What have others done to combat this technology's new threat to
>>relationship?
>
> -- 
>
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