I'm cutting and pasting from Michele Crockett's post which had a different
subject heading ("Families/Visitors at birth or post-birth"), so hers
doesn't appear with all these posts in the archives for this week.

Michele wrote as her concluding paragraph:
"Perhaps the best RULE would be honored by both families/friends and
hospital staff.  Baby stays on momma in the first 36 hours except for
showers and bathroom time when the baby is on the primary caregiver of the
mother and baby on discharge.  Family and friends who don't get it and only
want time with baby will soon leave and those that do get it will be real
supporters of this couplet and will be there when she needs them to be.
Warmly,
Michele"

I agree. Also agree with Nina Berry that there is no rule that fits
everyone. And I was surprised to find myself disagreeing with Heather
Welford, because I think some mothers (and some babies) do suffer from
being prevented from having contact with others in the first hour after
birth. Consider the serendipitous findings by Marshall Klaus several
decades ago which led to the discovery of what social support during labor
does for the progress of labor. The first hour is still part of that
process. Institutions might need to have rules to ensure that the needs of
the humans in them will be met. Those needs include emotional safety and
love. Not all institutions can provide these things, and yet they are among
the most important factors in discovering how to mother. The story of Nella
Cordelia points this up very powerfully (thanks, Alice - I am waiting for
my first appointment of the day and being grateful that I don't use makeup
because I'd have to reapply all of it, esp mascara and eyeliner).

My experience from home birth is that family members who are invited to the
birth, don't disturb the process, not even toddlers who want to be with
their mums as the baby finds the breast for the first time. Hospital staff
are far less sensitive to the emotional needs of the mother than her own
friends and family are, in general.

I like Michele's suggestion for a rule, if rules are what we need.
Rachel Myr
oxytocin junkie, not even trying to recover, in
Kristiansand, Norway

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