Kathy Dettwyler wrote: "I suspect...that this child would have died within
a few months of birth if she had been bottle-fed from the beginning. Would
this have been better than living to age 5 years and then dying?"
I have two thoughts on this thread: First, some mothers know in advance
that their children have a higher risk of the development of a disorder
that may impact their health, function, appearance and/or that may result
in an early death. Breastfeeding information and support are empowering to
a mother in such circumstances (as they are to mothers in all
circumstances): the mother can avoid adding the risks of infant formula to
her child's existing risks. She also may be motivated by her child's health
risks to breastfeed far beyond her culture's norm--responding intentionally
and carefully to her child's needs and development in issues such as
pattern of breastfeeding and duration.
Second, the loss of a child is painful regardless of when it occurs.
Sometimes people (health care providers, family, friends...) even
discourage mothers from attaching to children with health concerns in a
misguided attempt to "protect" a mother from grieving a child's possible
loss. This "protection" is not beneficial to the mother or her child.
"It is not uncommon for mothers of children with special needs to be told -
inaccurately - that their babies will not be able to breastfeed. They may
even be warned to not breastfeed their babies lest they become too attached
(Brewster 1979). This warning is based on the harmful misconception that
attachment is not important to or desirable for exceptional mother-baby
pairs. It also presumes that the death or institutionalization of a baby
can be made less painful if the mother and baby are less attached. In
reality, the loss of a child is always painful and many babies that were
expected to die or require extended care in a residential facility have
gone on to prove such predictions wrong. If a mother does lose her child,
her experience of breastfeeding may be among her most meaningful and
comforting memories. Breastfeeding promotes a high degree of
responsiveness, warmth, and love toward the breastfed child, and
availability of the mother. These are among the mothering patterns that
have been shown to enhance attachment security in all babies, including
those with special needs (Wasserman et al. 1987)."
Good Mojab, C. Congenital Disorders: Implications for Breastfeeding.
LEAVEN, Vol. 35 No. 6, December 1999-January 2000, pp. 123-28 (Full text
available online at:
http://www.lalecheleague.org/llleaderweb/LV/LVDec99Jan00p123.html)
Grateful for every day with my little girl,
Cynthia
Cynthia Good Mojab, MS Clinical Psychology
(Breastfeeding mother, advocate, independent [cross-cultural] researcher
and author; freelance writer; LLL Leader and Research Associate in the LLLI
Publications Department; and former psychotherapist currently busy
nurturing her own little one.)
Ammawell
Email: [log in to unmask]
Web site: http://members.home.net/ammawell
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