Lynn-I am not sure what you are asking here?  This mom isn't willing to use
the pacifier so it isn't really an issue in this case. Perhaps if this mum
could get out & meet other moms, whether it be at LLL meetings (ideally, for
breastfeeding support) or other moms & babies groups, she might not feel so
alone in meeting her baby's needs. Using a pacifier, if she were willing,
might make her feel less burned out as she would be possibly breastfeeding
less; however, if it sets up a whole new set of problems, such as nipple
preference, weight gain problems,early weaning resulting in more illnesses,
etc. then it's not really a solution. Perhaps recommending some books to her
might help such as The Fussy Baby by Sears.  Bottom line, & I am biased
here, having suffered nipple confusion & breastfeeding failure with my first
child, is it is a good thing she is not willing to go the pacifier route. So
I would never suggest a pacifer, but rather a sling as you have suggested,
support groups, reading etc, to reiterate.  What she needs is some support
in handling what is normal &  some gentle reminders that it is early days.
Good luck
Deborah sowery-Quinn
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