I was really struck by your comment that Mom was sleeping 10-13 hours/night,
was struggling with basic stuff and needed everything written down.
Screening for physical problems (thyroid, anemia) and depression may have
been useful.
One of the former contributors to this list used to say that she would
instuct the mom how to wean and also offer some suggestions on how to get
more sleep, have a social life with a new baby, etc. Offering suggestions
may help the mom see that there are options, including partial
breastfeeding. It is hard when clients don't seem to be able to care for
their baby or themselves very well. Take care, Rachel Wahl RN IBCLC
>
>Date: Wed, 6 Dec 2006 21:02:33 -0700
>From: "Andrea C. Tran" <[log in to unmask]>
>Subject: Why not get a plant instead?
>
>Mostly I need to vent, but any appropriate suggestions would be welcome.
>
>Saw a mom two days ago, chief complaint was sore nipples, and indeed
>the one was pretty beat up. I felt like the consult went well and
>this mom was on the right track. However, she needed me to write down
>EVERYTHING. I called her 24 hrs later to see how things were going.
>Not well. She was really struggling with pretty basic stuff. I had
>asked her to do some pumping to try to build up a borderline supply,
>and that seemed too much for her. So I said, JUST BREASTFEED. Called
>her back 24 hrs later - things not going well.
>
>Then she proceeded to tell me that she and her husband had a heart to
>heart about how stressful all this breastfeeding stuff was. She was
>used to getting lots of sleep, she could even sleep 10-13 hrs a night
>and the sleep deprivation was really hard. Okay, yes, I agree, sleep
>deprivation is hard. It's also part of being a mom, not just a
>breastfeeding mom. But, then she went on to whine about how social
>they used to be, and going out with their friends (this baby is only
>4 weeks old), and she was so tied to breastfeeding and pumping. She
>said she did say to her husband, "maybe I could just pump and
>bottlefeed" but he said "well, then you would be tied to that."
>
>I began to realize they just didn't like the life changes a baby
>brings and if not breastfeeding could minimize that, well then who
>cares if it's "healthier" for the baby?
>
>I wanted to yell at her, "Why didn't you just get a plant instead?"
>Of course I didn't. I said - don't make a decision now. Just pump and
>bottlefeed for a week. Get some rest. I told her many moms quit
>breastfeeding only to find it's being a parent that changes things,
>not really breastfeeding, and then regret their decision. I know she
>wanted permission, but I just couldn't give it.
>
>Is there anything else I could have said, besides "don't be so
>selfish"? I felt so frustrated.
>
>
>Andrea Tran RN, IBCLC
>Erie/Boulder, Colorado
>
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>End of LACTNET Digest - 6 Dec 2006 - Special issue (#2006-1406)
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