<< I was wondering if anyone could give me  some advice on how to
approach the mom who has a perceived low milk supply.  Over the past
year and a half that I have been counseling moms I have come across
several moms who have thriving infants (adequate growth on the charts
with plenty of diapers) who still feel that they can not satisfy
their babies, who appear to be fussy to them after feeds and when
they intervene with ABM via bottle their babies are quieter and go
longer between feeds.  <snip for bandwidth> >>

This has been a consistantly frustrating problem for me as well.  Particularly
when baby hits a growth spurt, Mom is ready with the bottle of formula,
totally unable to believe that her body can do this without artificial
intervention.

IME, these moms call five times a week, questioning the fact that their babies
are doing well, and seem incapable of seeing that their baby is thriving.
Unfortunately, their problem seems to have more to do with their overall
confidence level in *themselves* than it does with the health and well-being
of their babies.

The best I've been able to do is to continue to offer support and point out
how well the baby is growing, throwing in facts on all the wonderful things
that breastmilk does that formula will not.  In many cases, these moms
eventually wean to bottles anyway, but I get some comfort out of knowing that
without support, they'd have stopped breastfeeding within the first couple of
days instead of the weeks or months they can usually manage (with *lots* of
support) before being overwhelmed by their own self-doubt.

It's a horribly frustrating situation, and I think these women often have
psychological issues involved that we simply can't deal with.  As my District
Advisor pointed out to me, many of these women lack confidence in many other
areas of life as well.  We can't reshape their personalities, only do our best
to help them mother their kids.

There are also times that I've felt as if the mom is looking for a reason to
quit but feels guilty to just stop, so she'll convince herself that she
*cannot* breastfeed, despite any amount of evidence to the contrary.  She'd
rather "fail" at breastfeeding than have to deal with the emotional fallout of
making what she knows is a selfish and inferior choice.  This often seems to
be the case with mothers who are more informed, but unwilling to be available
for their babies as much a breastfeeding relationship requires.  They would
much rather talk sadly about how they "couldn't" breastfeed than admit that
they stopped because breastfeeding interfered with their social lives, or diet
plans, or......
:::sigh::::

Sorry if this seems pessimistic, but this seems to be my year for these moms.
:-(  It's a frustrating situation.

Diane DiCarlo
LLLLeader
Brooklyn, NY