In a message dated 97-04-11  Laurie wrote in response to my posting:

<< It makes me sad, though, to hear that you're ANGRY with your sister,
Evonne.
 Just remember that you did the best you could and offered as much support as
 you could, but ultimately it is your sister's baby and your sister's
 decision. That's why it is so much harder to work with family--we can get
 tremendously wrapped up in the emotions of it all.
  >>
  I still have a good relationship with my sister.  She knows how I feel
however and I have told her I can't promise not to say something in the
future about the "stuff" my nephew "has" to eat.    I am ANGRY because she
for years could "talk the talk" but when came to doing it coudn't "walk the
walk".  I know different things go into why some people stick with it and
others quit.  I feel for those that failed because of lack of help.  Those
that quit when help is available, and they know it, are the ones that make me
mad, and yes sad also.
     I should add that I am 15 years older than this sis and yes have done
the mother role many times.
     I have rec'd many replies privately.  Most have had in-law problems more
than sibs.  My question on influencing really is about at what point are the
decisions being made to parent a certain way (including bf).  And how
effective is the short time we have in class or in consult situations to
influence their decision.  I know studies have  been done but none conclusive
that I am aware of (on the point of decision).
     I think some of the replies should go on lactnet.  Our failures as well
as successes are all learning opportunites!

Evonnne
In Tn where it is 74 sunny degrees!