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Subject:
From:
"Kathleen Miller, I.B.C.L.C." <[log in to unmask]>
Reply To:
Lactation Information and Discussion <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Tue, 8 Sep 1998 23:32:29 -0500
Content-Type:
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To: Pat, Louise, Jack, Gail and everyone else,
 I have started a"morale booster collection" for myself.  On especially   
hard days, I revisit this and try to draw strength from it. It includes:
 A picture of a mother and baby I took care of when I worked on the Zuni   
Indian Reservation.  This mother had several FAS (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome)   
babies and came to us for help with her latest pregnancy.  She did not   
want to bring another FAS child into the world.  We  all worked hard   
(doctors, nurses, family , friends, social services, etc.) with her   
through the entire pregnancy. I had the PRIVLEDGE of teaching her   
prenatal classes.  She gave birth to a 9 pound baby girl.  The picture I   
took was of the two of them in the hospital at one day postpartum.   
 Unfortunately, the mother returned to drinking a few moths later.  The   
baby  up in a foster home, and the mother died within a year  of   
kidney/liver failure.  But the little girl  is NOT a FAS or FAE child.  I   
hope someone has the courage one day to explain to her how much her   
mother loved her and what she went through to insure she'd be normal.
 Another item is a kerchief.  I tell our NICU mothers to leave a small   
item of clothing with their scent on it with the baby , and to take home   
something of the baby's to smell, especially when they are pumping.  One   
mother took this advice to heart. She got different colored kerchiefs.   
 Everyday she would come in wearing a different one around her neck.  She   
would then exchange that one for the one left with the baby, etc.  After   
8 weeks, her son finally went home.  As a thank you gift she gave me the   
kerchief she was wearing that day.
 On another occasion I was in a shopping mall parking lot.  I had just   
gotten into my car when a knock on the window startled me.  I turned to   
see a young woman standing there, and I rolled down my window.  "I know   
you don't remember me ", she said, " but you helped me breastfeed my baby   
when we were in the hospital.  If it wasn't for you, I never would have   
breastfed him.  He's 6 months old now and I just stopped and I just   
wanted to say thank you."  Then she walked away before I could say   
anything.  To this day I do not know who she was.  I CAN tell you I sat   
in my car and cried.
 Just some suggestions.  In closing I'd like to quote the late John   
Denver:
 "It's hard to tell the truth when no one wants to listen, when no one   
really cares what's going on...
 It's hard to stand alone when you need someone beside you, your spirit,   
your faith, must be strong...
 What one man can do is dream, what one man can do is love, what one man   
can do is change the world and make it young again...
 Here you see what one man can do."

 None of us are out there alone. And if LACTNET hasn't convinced you of   
that, I don't know what will. 
    Love, Kathy

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