Nikki describes the behavior of babies when placed skin-to-skin with mother
(after a floundering start, I think). This is a more accentuated version of
the normal human infant behaviour if left alone on mother's chest/abdomen
immediately after birth. Some babies don't cry at all; most cry some. They
may be not well flexed at shoulders, elbows, knees and hips at the moment of
birth, but they quickly adopt a flexed position, either during or just after
that first cry. They bring hands to mouth. They extend their arms and if
they brush past a nipple they will open up their hands and grab it,
squeezing it unconsciously for a time. Then the hands go back to the mouth,
and the light bulb goes on over the head. They either turn toward the
breast and squint at it intently, or move toward it with their entire body.
Sometimes they just curl up on the breast, embracing it, and sometimes they
bob along and latch right on, and then they are there to stay.
Babies who have been separated seem to cry more, though I have also observed
some of the clearest smiles I have ever seen in a baby, and on two
occasions, GIGGLES, from babies less than 36 hours old, on being reunited
with their mothers.
I have my own theory about what the baby is trying to tell us with that
post-separation crying, and if possible I prepare mother for the crying that
usually comes in these situations. I think they recognize the smell and
sound of mother, after missing her for whatever reason, which must arouse a
primal angst we can barely begin to imagine. This is the first time they
have felt safe enough to let out all that angst - they need to tell her
about it before they can move on. So far I haven't seen a baby who doesn't
settle in reasonably short order on being placed skin to skin, but without
that 'anticipatory guidance' I think it is much scarier for mothers, and for
anyone else who may be present.
All this is magnified if the baby has been traumatized by misguided efforts
to force them to the breast. Again, skin to skin works wonders. No
gadgets! No time limits! Only great feelings and massive
endorphin/oxytocin release in mother and baby!!
It's exactly like the crying hospitalized children would do if visited by
mother or father, which led to parents being banned from the pediatrics
wards decades ago because 'they only upset the patient'. Children were very
passive and resigned when surrounded by strangers, and only dared show their
feelings when the parents were there. (Shudder.) I think children who skin
their knees at preschool without batting an eye, and then scream bloody
murder when their parents come to collect them, are doing the same thing.
If they are crying out of fear at being taken home, it doesn't look the
same.
Tomorrow I am seeing a family who had this kind of skin to skin experience.
The breastfeeding isn't perfect yet; milk supply is fine, though, and baby
is getting plenty of milk. After three days of various staff pressuring and
cajoling him to breast, with unswervingly miserable results, we started skin
to skin therapy (and I do mean therapy). "We have a new baby!" the mother
reported the next morning when I got to work. "I felt like the baby who was
crying and crying just wasn't the contented baby I carried inside my belly.
But he's back now!"
Skin to skin is not a quick fix; often it is the ONLY fix. There are some
things you can't take shortcuts on. Raising children and baking bread are
the two main ones, IMO. But the process is so rich in both cases, why would
you want it to be over sooner?
Rachel Myr
Kristiansand, Norway
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