Dear Friends:
 
Interesting discussion. Here's another take on this topic.
 
For me, maturation as a professional has made me more open and accepting. 
When I first started, I was determined that every mother I worked with should 
have an unmedicated,  spontaneous labor and breastfeed. I spent a lot of energy 
fighting to create that reality. I made people resistant and defensive by this 
attitude, and probably did as much harm as good.
 
Time and education have worked wonders. I now realize that I personally can 
not change the US exclusive breastfeeding initiation rate with every mother I 
see. We all have our unique histories, our individual situations, and infinite 
variations. While I know that exclusive breastfeeding is the best way to 
start, what really matters clinically is what the new mother I am seeing right now 
knows, values, and wants. How can I create an environment where we can have an 
open discussion? How does she see herself as a mother? How can I have her 
tell me more about herself, before I put a suggestion into the discussion about 
exclusive breastfeeding? How relevant is my suggestion to her life? (Especially 
as babies are too frequently supplemented  with formula in the hospital.) 
 
In the hospital, I am but one more walk-on in her movie. Remember Barbara 
Morrison's lovely research showing that the average number of interruptions for a 
new mother is 71 in 14 hours! How in the world can this mother remember me 
when she has a cast of thousands streaming through her life?
 
I don't care if she remembers me; I want her to know her baby!
 
My main goal is to promote attachment. I do suggest we get the baby involved 
in the discussion, hence s2s! Once they are s2s, I sit down and we chat about 
things. Even if breastfeeding doesn't occur, she will have learned to look at 
her baby more. The baby is the ONLY  one she needs to look at and learn from, 
not me, not any other person.
 
If she hates the idea of breastfeeding, does she know it is possible to pump 
and give her baby the best milk in the world? I've met many women that didn't 
know such was possible, or have been actively discouraged by health care 
professional! The way I see it is to promote attachment and connection and assist 
with keeping milk flowing. Ideally that is with the baby and breastfeeding, but 
if it is with a pump, then I am sure to tell her about the case study that 
Donna Ramsey Geddes mentioned (of the mother that pumped for 2 years) so the 
mother in front of me knows what is possible. 
 
I am not so interested in knowing why she's made her decision, at least not 
in the hospital. What can I do about it anyway? I do want her to be the best 
mother she can be; if she can have the experience of holding that sweet body 
next to her heart, she's on her way. If breastfeeding occurs, terrific! If she 
knows where she can find help, excellent. If she wants to pump and bottlefeed, 
fabulous. It is her life, not mine. If she has the experience of  s2s, and can 
do it at home....she and her baby will discover each other. Who knows where 
that will lead?
 
warmly,
 
Nikki Lee RN, MS, Mother of 2, IBCLC, CCE, CIMI
_http://www.breastfeedingalwaysbest.com/_ 
(http://www.breastfeedingalwaysbest.com/) 
www.myspace/AdonicaLee



************************************** See what's free at http://www.aol.com.

             ***********************************************

Archives: http://community.lsoft.com/archives/LACTNET.html
Mail all commands to [log in to unmask]
To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail
To start it again: set lactnet mail (or [log in to unmask])
To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet or ([log in to unmask])
To reach list owners: [log in to unmask]