Well, I agree with almost everyone here in some way.
I really agree with Pat that you should not have to subject yourself to
being the LC for your daughter in law, Ilene.  Especially if things don't go
well, your relationship to her could suffer far longer than the duration of
breastfeeding.  She really needs your support as grandma, the grandma who
really approves of her choices and doesn't care what shape her breasts are.
Sounds like she needs breastfeeding support as well, but surely there is
someone in the state of Massachusetts who could look after that part of it?
Maybe grandma could give her a gift of some consultations with a trusted
colleague :-)

I have the same attitude as Pat, that a term baby who is not gaining
convincingly by the end of the first week merits a closer look.  If the
closer look reveals cause for serious concern, then pursue those.  But if
the closer look shows that things may be on their way to a resolution, then
follow the watchful, expectant route and exude trust in the parents, esp the
mother.

I also agree with Heather and with Jean, that there are a number of things
in the situation that are actually reassuring, such as baby not continuing
to lose weight.  I would definitely have someone evaluate the tongue tie
(someone else!!) and try to get it treated if deemed a problem.  And I would
be really concerned about mother's self-confidence. 

Here's hoping your relationship to the new parents can become a purely
grandmotherly one, and someone else can relieve you of the LC part of it.

Rachel Myr
Looking forward to grandmotherhood at some unspecified time in the future
and hoping I am up to the challenge :-)

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