<I cringed when I read this:
>Because of what was going on inside of me, I avoided my very dear LLL
>friends for 8 whole months because I didn't want to hear any
>encouragement after I had made my firm decision to feed formula.>
I regret that my memories made you cringe, Kathy. I was simply affirming
Heather's idea that these feelings often emanate from INSIDE mothers
themselves.
I was claiming and reporting truthfully ("confessing") the feelings that
I remember went on inside of me 30 years ago. This was in relation to
some very close friends whom I had developed through LLL and Dayton CEA
during the previous decade.
To this day, one of them is a valued co-worker whom I claim as one of my
very best friends (And I might add, I salute her as one of the very best
LC's in the this state, and probably the nation!)
It was just simply *my own reaction*, my own stuff that perhaps developed
inside of me because of my own too zealously expressed, unrealistic,
unwisely articulated standards earlier when I myself had once been
working within LLL.
I'm glad that your feelings were different.
< No one ever made me feel bad that I
was formula-feeding my son, or had only been able to breastfeed for 4
months.>
No, I did not mean to convey that. I firmly believe Eleanor Roosevelt hit
the nail on the head when she said "No one can make you feel inferior
without your permission."
Trouble is, I didn't know that at that time when I was age 41. In the
long run, I have found it was a good lesson in humility that, to this
day, continues to help me when I interact with mothers. (Thanks, Lord. I
needed that!)
Took me down a peg or two since. Without some of my personal negative
memories, I wouldn't be doing what I am doing today. They have helped me
to value that every mom is doing what she feels best for her child within
her own personal situation.
< I would hope that people don't shy away from LLL meetings just
because they have made a decision to formula-feed. And of course I would
hope that LLL members would never fault a mother for using formula,
regardless of her reason.>
My hopes too.
Jean
*****************
K. Jean Cotterman RNC, IBCLC
Dayton, Ohio USA
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