gima wrote:
>
> I am writing a lot today, while I await a mom's call telling me whether she
> wants to continue working on breastfeeding or wants to "chicken out" and go
> to abm feeding. That's not nice, I know, but my ego is bruised this
> morning. I worked her into a very hectic schedule yesterday and got the
> baby feeding well. I called her in the late afternoon to see how things
> were going. and the four feedings of the day had gone well. She cancelled
> today's appointment because everything was so good.
>
> Then last night at 10:00 she called on my home phone (I had turned off my
> bus. phone) and was in distress--engorged and wouldn't let down. I gave
> her some suggestions and said that she should call me this morning. She
> was angry that I wouldn't come out last night. I have been known to go in
> the night, but just couldn't put one foot in front of the other last night.
>
> I called her this morning and she said that she decided to stop
> breastfeeding. We talked for a bit, with my having her see how she will
> feel in a few days or weeks if she stops. She breastfed her two other
> children for 3 months each.
>
> She is talking it over with her husband and will call me back. I don't
> expect a call.
>
> Well, that's not what I am writing about. I just wanted to share my
> frustration about a case that could have been so easily resolved.
> _____________________________________________________
> "I wish I had" case:
>
> I worked with a mother in February and March whose baby was having a
> difficult time feeding. His suck was not strong. She fed with a
> supplementer for a while, as she built up her milk supply. Early on, I
> suggested that she have him evaluated by my OT who works with suck problems
> and who does Cranial Sacral work. From the beginning the mother would
> never entertain the possibility that anything was "wrong" with her baby.
> She went to heroic measures to get her baby totally breastfeeding,
> including using breast compression throughout every feeding for the 5
> months that she fed him.
>
> She came by to bring me a gift last week, and baby had a strange head
> device. She said that, as the months went on, his head became grossly
> misshapen and he was comfortable in only certain positions. The Ped
> referred her to a physicial therapist who found that he had a distorted
> muscle in his neck that prevented flexibility and that his misshapen head
> was a result of that. There is a new specially designed head brace that is
> re-shaping his head and they visit the PT regularly for work on his neck.
> If the therapy doesn't resolve the problem, surgery is recommended.
>
> He is 6 months old and is behind in motor development skills, caused by his
> constraints.
>
> I feel certain that his suckling problems reflected other physicial
> problems that could have been easily resolved in those early days,
> preventing this now-serious physicial condition.
>
> "I wish I had" spoken with more insistence to the parents and to the Ped in
> those early days about my strong feelings that there was a need for body work.
>
> I won't be as "cooperative" next time. I try to respect the parents where
> they are and to remember that the baby is *their* baby. And, of course, I
> don't know that they would have listened even if I had been really pushy.
>
> I am going to talk with the mother about having my OT see him even now.
> I'll bet there is something that could be done by her skilled hands that
> could prevent surgery. The mother has had to finally admit that her baby
> isn't "perfect" and she might continue to be resistent to my suggestions,
> but I will try.
>
> Pat Gima, IBCLC
> Milwaukee, Wisconsin
>
> mailto:[log in to unmask]
>
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I know it's hard but we have to remeber we can't fix them all. We can
only provide the information and what they do with it is up to them
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