After reading the post from Friday about this site, I too searched
breastfeeding and read the answer to the mom who wrote in for
suggestions on weaning her 2.5 yr old.  I too found the answer lacking
in good judgement and wrote to them to tell them so.

A Bruce Epstein, MD replied "Thanks for your comment. You are, of
course, quite correct and as soon as I can find the question I will
revise the answer. Interestingly, that answer was written by our
lactation consultant and the incorrect material slipped by me. With my
daughter in law being a pediatric dentist, I am VERY aware of the
dangers of a bottle after one
year of age!
Any other comments about our site would be most appreciated, and if you
would be interested in adding
something to the site, let me know."
Bruce Epstein, M.D.

I in turn wrote back:

"Thank you for responding so promptly to my comments.

Actually, I found several remarks in the response to be less than
optimal.  First,  the opening remark "it sounds as if you are a bit too
compliant..." It's a shame to begin by criticizing the mom.  Second,
"...the standards in your community.." Irrelevant to the question
entirely. Third, "a 2.5 yr. old is probably too mature to be nursing."
This statement is insupportable by clinical evidence, is strictly the
opinion of the author and as such is inappropriate here, unless
identified as opinion rather than fact.  Fourth, the bottle of milk
suggestion as regards to dental carries, but also, there is no reason to
assume that a nursing child this age has ever had a bottle, or would
accept one.  Even if the child would accept it, the mom would simply
have to wean him again, next time from the bottle.  Fifth, in my
experience, few pediatricians have a significant amount of background in
breastfeeding and far fewer have such an extensive amount that they
would be likely to have dealt with many 2.5 yr. old children at weaning
time.  Perhaps this observation is not accurate in your area, but in the
Dallas/Ft. Worth area it is.

I believe that I would have chosen to address this mom's concern like
this:

First, it is important that you have a definite goal in mind that
considers what is best for both you and your child. Providing that there
is not a situation going on in which your child has extra need for
comfort and reassurance, then I would encourage you to decide if a
complete weaning is what you desire.  Would you be happy to continue to
nurse your child if the frequency of his demands were reduced to a level
that you found more reasonable, say once or twice daily?  Perhaps this
type of compromise would best meet both of your needs.

In any case, after you have decided what your goal is, allow your child
to participate in the weaning as opposed to imposing it upon him.  Some
mothers find that the expectation of a "weaning" party can motivate
their child to wean happily.  Certainly at 2.5 yr.s of age, limit
setting is appropriate and desirable.  Explain what your expectations
are during a time of day when he is rested and happy, avoid springing
the idea on him at bedtime.  Once you have made your decision and
prepared your child, it is important for you to be firm and consistent
with him.  If you "give in" after tears and tantrums you will be setting
yourself up for a much more difficult time down the road.
Be prepared to make up this time with your child with other close,
comforting activities."

Dr. Epstein then responded:

"I like your response, and with your permission, would like to use it.
Would you like your name after the answer, and, would you be interested
in responding to future breast feeding questions?"

Fellow Lactnetters, I am very impressed with the fast response I
received to my complaint, the way my opinion was addressed and the way a
corrected response is planned to the mom's question.  I congratulate the
publishers of this site for their obvious desire to provide the best
information available and to being responsive to outside suggestions.  I
believe that this site may turn out to be one that we can count on good
breastfeeding information being promoted from in the future.

Yeah!

Denny Rice, RN, IBCLC
Dallas, Texas USA

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