>If anyone has any good way of getting the idea that food (ie dad feeding
>baby a bottle, even if it is breastmilk) doesn't have to be associated with
>love, I'd like to know!

I like the LLL/medella breastfeeding video section on fathers.  It does a
great job of showing father infant interaction, and in this case a picture
is more effective than words.  As one Dad said, "I had never seen a man
alone with a small baby before".  I also like the short section of the video
Breast is Best where the newborn is resting naked on his dad's chest. There
is a later section where dad leaves breakfast beside the bed when he leaves
for work in the morning that is also great. Mom and babe are snuggled up
sleeping :)  Often I think the dads simply don't have any ideas what else TO
do, other than feeding.  I always bring up that moms don't have to get up at
night dads are quite capable of managing the diaper changes and can bring
the babe to the mom to feed in bed. I present this humorously and it always
gets a laugh -- and a lot of nudges from the women to their partners.