Dear all,
    The tale of the mom who was told it '"was not in her best interest " to
BF now that she has twins/had a stroke, or substitute manifests diabetes, or
whatever unforeseen challenge arises reminded me of something in New
Beginnings not too long ago: a mother who gave birth unexpectedly to a
premature baby was in the NICU visiting and the nurse asked her the following
question:
HAD you planned on breastfeeding?
The mother said this was the question she needed to be asked and was able to
answer Yes, and the nurse helped her get started. She said if someone had
asked "DO you want to BF, it would have not so clearly reminded her that yes
she did plan to do this, and there is therefore no reason why she shouldn't,
even with the complications. Do you want to BF does not emphasize that the
mother could continue on her plan despite almost overwhelming emotions and
challenges; it is a question of "now" and the now was so overhwelming mother
felt she would have answered that question with a "no". "Had you [Planned "is
a wonderful question for nurses to be asking post-partum. It seems to
ackowledge that the mother made a decision - her decision- and she still has
power to carry it out. I guess it could also serve as a springboard for
providing mothers with the excellent reasons to BF a sick or small baby even
if they hadn't planned on doing it under "normal" birth circumstances.
     Just wanted to share that -the awesome power of words "used for good
instead of evil".                Judy Fram, Brooklyn, NY