Dear Lactnet friends:

Many of you have told me you enjoy my sense of humor. I thank you and tell
you that I also enjoy all of your erudite, loving, entertaining and thought
provoking contributions to Lactnet. With that said, I am going to turn
serious for a change, and  although I may be opening up a very large-size
can of worms, I feel that this issue is extremely important and would
benefit from a discussion here on our wonderful Milky Way. Ok, enough
preamble.

Remember when we were talking about the issue of BINDING?
One LC commented that while having lunch with a neonatologist who said
something to the effect that he didn't see why binding wasn't an acceptable
way to handle engorgement and over-supply, drying up, etc. She responded
that he should consider how it would feel to bind an erect penis to the
leg, tightly.  Accordingly, he sort of squirmed and crossed his legs under
the table ....and seemed to have gotten her point.

I laughed heartily when I read this tale...and as an entertaining anecdote,
recounted it to a person who I respect, who is very sympathetic and
knowledgeable about breastfeeding, and who has worked very closely with LCs
and hospitals for almost 20 years.  In other words, I told this to an LC
advocate par excellence.

Thank heavens for his ability to express the following thoughts...and for
his honesty in sharing them with me, rather than simply dismissing me as
just another  BF-anti-male-doctor-fanatic with her perspective out of
whack.

Here are his comments:

>There is a strong tendency among LC's to make analogies between Breastfeeding
>problems and male sexual organs. I believe that is used for a shock value but
>really diminishes any education role. Although this analogy may satisfy the
>sender that the message has been received it may serve to harden attitudes
>among health professionals for the following reasons:
>
>        1.The Penis is a dual use organ but is primarily associated with its
>sexual functions. In order to reply to anyone making this anaolgy would
>probably have to engage in a conversation of a sexual nature. This may be
>uncomfortable for some. These doctors will then cease communications with the
>person in any meaningful form, they will also let there collegues know
>about the
>crazy talk the LC had with him.
>
>        2. The analogy usually has little basis in scientific fact. In this
>example There are few cases of unrelieved engorgement in the Penis such as
>Priaprism. These cases have to have surgical or pharmaceutical
>intervention. Thesuggested treatment might lead to physical harm.
Engorgement of the Penis and
>the BReast have completely different Physiological basis. To suggest that they
>are nearly the same or that the treatment would be as such would be incorrect.
>
>        3. Using this analolgy,it again makes a subtle reference to the sexual
>nature of the Breast. If Penis and Breast are linked there would be a strong
>tendency to agin see the Breast as primarily a sexual organ.

I have responded to him with the following:

 "Your comments touch on issues which are extremely significant, especially
if we truly want to effect profound change in attitudes which seem to
pervade our society.

 However, I feel the MOST important factor which gives undeniable validity
to your remarks  is the fact that your observations come from:

1) a male perspective - yet one which is extremely sensitive to women's
issues.  2) a person who has worked successfully with women in the health
field for several decades.
                and finally,
3) an understanding and wisdom gained from the day-to-day implementation of
the belief that relating many of our bodily parts and functions to merely a
sexual role diminishes us in a larger way and narrows the way in which we,
as men and women, can and should relate to each other.

We all have so much to offer each other as total human-beings, far beyond
our sexual identities....yet when we get mired down on such a basic level
we lose out on the vast richness that friendships between the sexes can
offer.

Your note today very clearly brings home to me the message that: in order
for the breast to be viewed in the context of its true and primary function
as the wonderful font of sustainance that it is .... we must also view the
penis as simply a very efficient and well designed organ which assists in
the elimination of body wastes, just as it also performs the necessary job
of serving as the vehicle by which sperm may reach the egg in that magical
process of procreation.

When pediatricians joke with me and make comments about how babies love the
breast...and then go on to say that male babies, in particular, never seem
to lose their fascination for the breast (They sneer at this point...or is
it lear...I am never quite sure which )......well, I see that making
comments about engorgement & erections is equally as sexist and would only
contribute to an alienation of the listener, as you mention.

Lord knows, we need to be focusing on OPENING doors, not closing them!"
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  Ok, off the soapbox I step, ready for the rotten eggs !

Roberta, The Mexican Milk Maid and soon-to-be-covered-in-scrambled-eggs LC