This is such a frustrating situation - and I just attended an excellent presentation in the GOLD conference to help LC's through the emotional turmoil of the parents.  You are so right that it is essential to handle this family with gentleness...being told there is something wrong with your baby is overwhelming - and the expectation of a "quick fix" that surgery often seems to promise but not deliver adds to it.

Almost all the speakers at the Tongue Tie sessions recommended at least some CST or body work be done even before a revision - due to changes that can occur in the mouth of a baby who has suffered as it sounds like your case has...which will lead to better success of the surgery - or even not needing it at all!

I'd also consider giving mom "permission" (support) to stop breastfeeding and bottle feed (cue-based) for a while.  At times I found that when they felt I really understood how much they hurt, they could return to address the issue with more emotional strength when "allowed" to go a step back and regroup.  Otherwise she may stop all together...

I explain it as: we don't always travel in a direct line, sometimes we have to take a detour to get where we want to go.  I myself had to stop breastfeeding a 3 month old who, in one day, cut both my nipples with his teeth (yes, he had three teeth) in such a way that each latch was agony and pulled open the wound.  A weekend of "rest" allowed everything to mend enough that we continued on just fine...I had to use hand expression as the pump would also pull it open again.

Meanwhile, referring for CST or a good chiropractor with experience with infants sounds right.  How to do it is a challenge.  Perhaps gently pointing out misalignments in the baby's head, body, movements that you see which may reflect that the BABY has pain or discomfort may give them the rationale for pursuing it.  

Good luck - it's a tough one, and they're getting tougher these days!

Jeanette Panchula, BSW, RN, PHN, IBCLC
Vacaville, CA


Jeanette

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