When I was looking for resources after my son died, I came across this pamphlet on the motherwear blog. The post  said to use the pamphlet as we saw fit. I took this guide as a base and made some changes to fit our local community.  
 
I think it is important to give moms some anticipatory guidance before they leave the hospital.  Many women don't even realize that their milk will still "come in" if they don't have a baby nursing.  My milk came in on the morning of my sons funeral, and I just remember how physically uncomfortable it was to hug people all day with engorged breasts.  
 
I think it is also important to remember the range of emotions bereaved mothers are experiencing. On one hand, I almost enjoyed pumping, because it was the last physical evidence that I really had a baby. Yet, on the other hand, I wanted to stop pumping as soon as possible so that I could return to ovulation and try to conceive again.  Learning that other moms have had similar feelings can relieve a lot of anxiety.
 
I think that every bereaved mom should receive a call from the hospital lactation consultant in the first three days after discharge.  The fact that she will continue to lactate is often overlooked on discharge instructions.  Also, if she was planning to breastfeed, the loss of that whole experience can feel like another loss in and of itself.  As her LC, you may be the only one who understands this and can be a wonderful support to her. 

 

> Date: Tue, 20 Mar 2012 09:56:26 -0700
> From: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Fetal Demise
> To: [log in to unmask]
> 
> One of my favorite resources about fetal demise is this pamphlet that was shared on the Motherwear site by the organization Empty Arms: http://motherwear.typepad.com/files/final-us-lactation-after-loss-brochure.pdf
> 
> The Empty Arms website is another resource for mothers: http://www.emptyarmswesternma.blogspot.com/
> 
> Best,
> Leanna Moore Watson, BS, IBCLC, RLC
> 
> 
> 
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