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Sat, 4 Feb 2012 17:39:19 -0500 |
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Virginia, funny u mention this. When I had my first child, my mother-in-law at the time was extremely anxious/non-supportive about me breastfeeding. It wasn't until she told her story that I understood and could be empathetic towards her instead of angry.
When she had my ex- husband, they lived with her in laws. She became severely engorged and subsequently developed mastitis. Her mother-in-law sucked her breast in order to "remove the poison". Obviously, she had either done this before or seen it done. Well my ex- MIL is very modest and was so ashamed and humiliated to even tell the story I could only imagine how she felt at that time. After that she stopped breastfeeding.
My heart went out to her.
Her fear was truly for me. When I started nursing that painful memory came flooding back to her like it was yesterday.
I commonly tell my clients that the way women react/respond/treat them has all to do with that woman's past experience -good or bad. Those memories run long and deep -to the very core of who we are. Understanding that concept helps us to be more tolerant and empathetic - instead of taking it personally. When someone reacts negatively -first thing to do is ask them to tell me their story. That usually explains everything.
Maria Parlapiano RN IBCLC
Chatham, NJ
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