Karyn asks:
<Wise ones, what do you know about infant personalities?>

This brought to mind one of my 6 children, one of those with whom I couldn't "make it" past 5 days of painful nipples (54 years ago - BLLL, Before La Lache League, that is.) This phenomenon happens to formula fed babies too.  I now recognize that had he been born decades later, he would have been Dx with GERD. Having pronounced myself a fine mom after my experience with the first 2, who had my genetic digestive characteristics, I found the "high needs" days plus the night waking very hard to cope with. Without much medical diagnostic help at that time, I kept trying to puzzle out if something I was doing could account for the difference. 

By myself, observing physical characteristics, I settled on an "embryonic layer" theory. Like me, the first 2 must have had an abundance of endoderm, with very efficient GI tracts, whereas he, taking after his dad's side, must have had less of the endodermal layer, and therefore, perhaps not as efficient a baby GI tract. So, I reasoned that therefore, he must have more of the ectoderm (nerve tissue) and mesoderm (musculoskeletal), and gradually convinced myself that he must be able to pick up sensations more acutely, and therefore, react more obviously and actively.

Years went by, more children, multiple experiences and more insights, (and thankfully LLL) came. I often found it challenging to keep up with him: much musical talent, clever at the "let's you and him fight" game, smiling as he watched calm siblings start to squabble soon after he came on the scene, top student, high school athlete, exploring many avenues to check how to put his talents to best use . . . . the term "gifted child" was much in vogue then, and over the years, yea, over the first several decades, I began to relax my self-criticism and feel a sense of resilience at how well I had actually done my part, as I saw him developing into the wonderful young man he was no doubt designed to be. 

I wouldn't embarrass him by identifying him now, but he uses his  "Let's you and him fight!" talent in his profession;-)

I must admit that in counseling moms, after checking for obvious problems, I reassure and praise the value of all the touch and personal contact a mother contributes, and more than once, have briefly suggested the possibility "that we can't tell yet, but don't be surprised if s/he may turn out to be a "gifted child".

K. Jean Cotterman RNC-E, IBCLC
WIC LC Volunteer Dayton OH
 

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