Susan Burger writes, after musing about die-hard ideas from the century
before last: 'Just heard of another case of a mother who was told her six
week premature baby (who is now five weeks out of the womb and only 6
pounds) needed sleep training.'
When my granddaughter was recovering from her heart surgery at age five
weeks and one day, her mother was subjected to the following useful
information from a NICU nurse at the Royal Norwegian National Hospital in
Oslo, after having sat with the baby, feeding her and holding her, for about
two hours, from midnight until 2:00 a.m. Baby had been gavage fed from the
first post-op day until the middle of the third post-op day, when she was
able to be held again without pain. From that moment on she resumed
breastfeeding and when this incident occurred she had been back at breast
for just over two days. Every time my daughter thought she had fallen
asleep and tried to place her back on the special bed she used while in
NICU, the baby woke and wanted to feed some more, so she fed her. She
didn't mind a bit, she was very happy to be there with her, able to comfort
her in the way they both liked best. After two hours, the baby really did
fall asleep, and she could be placed back in her bed. She was on several
continuous monitors still, so she couldn't be taken out of the room, and my
daughter had finally been allowed to sleep on a couch in a small room on the
ward rather than having to go all the way back to the 'hotel' wing where
parents of such patients were expected to overnight. From the hotel it took
a minimum of ten minutes for her to get there from when staff phoned her to
say the baby was awake, and from this couch she could be there in half a
minute, so she was happy to sacrifice a real bed for proximity to her baby.
Anyway, this useful information - the night nurse said drily and
authoritatively, as the baby was laid back in bed, 'If she takes that long
at a feed, she's using the breast for something COMPLETELY different from
what it's intended for.'
'Using the breast for something completely different' etc quickly became a
family classic, but it is deeply disturbing to think what effect such
a comment has on a mother who didn't have the advantage of spending a month
at home getting to know her baby, developing a consciousness about
parenting. Most babies in NICUs have been there from birth or very shortly
thereafter and the parents may not have any frame of reference for caring
for them, and they will assume that a nurse who works there is knowledgeable
about what babies need, even when the statement reveals such an outdated
understanding of human behavior. That this happened at the same hospital
where the National Breastfeeding Resource Center is based, is even more
disturbing, not to mention that the baby was in fact actively transferring
milk for most of the two hours, in perfect synchrony with her physical
ability to take it in.
If I had been there I think I may have turned violent. I would have wanted
to ask 'Exactly which use of the breast is the *one* it is intended for, in
the case of a five week old exclusively breastfed baby recovering from open
heart surgery, please?' and I would have wanted to have a stranglehold
around the nurse's neck when I put the question to her. Luckily
for everyone I was far from Oslo.
On a brighter note, there was an article about baby-wearing in one of the
Oslo papers this week, to publicize a conference for baby-wearers where
anyone wanting to learn how to tie a sling was invited to drop in during the
weekend. Prams are synonymous with babies in Norway and most people can't
even imagine life without one, though bucket-style car seats are making
scary inroads as a way of transporting babies. The article was beautiful,
featuring one group of women who met at their common well-child center
postpartum and I think they all learned about slings from one of the mothers
in the group, who happens to be a mother-to-mother BF counsellor in
Ammehjelpen, our support organization, AND a pediatrician at the National
Hospital. So there is hope! It's only available in Norwegian but Google
Translator is usually really entertaining, give it a try. The
pediatrician's name is Cecilie. *http://www.dagsavisen.no/i
nnenriks/article517388.ece*
cheers
Rachel Myr, Kristiansand, Norway
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