Thanks, Tina. I think "phobos" and "misos" are two reactions that are usually bound up
together, aren't they? Most of us would agree that misogyny is typically inspired by,
among other things, fear of women. In any case, I sense that some who have responded
to my post are concerned that I wish to let bigots off the hook, which is not what I want
to do at all. On the contrary, I am exploring ways of talking about this phenomenon that
place responsibility for this discomfort squarely on the shoulders of the discomfited.
Nor am I proposing that we call up the people who write the DSM and tell them we have
a new clinical diagnosis, or that we should mollycoddle people who spew nastiness
regarding breastfeeding. Rather, I am exploring what might be going on when people
respond with fear and loathing to something so normative.
I am also looking for a discourse that is less black and white, and less "you are either
with us or against us." I grew up seeing very little breastfeeding, and there is still part of
me that finds it strange to see a woman breastfeeding -- and I've been breastfeeding for
9 years now and spend a great deal of my time with other breastfeeding mothers. I
brought this up in this forum, because, historically, lactnet has been a place where we
can discuss ideas such as these in a spirited way, but without being shouted down or
mocked.
Nikki just wrote very beautifully about how to approach the difficulties new mothers face
when they have little or no experience with babies or breastfeeding. I guess I am asking
a similar question on a cultural level. I certainly did not mean, and am a bit disheartened
that I was taken to mean that places where public breastfeeding is legally protected
would be filled with people overcome by the sight.
In any case, I am optimistic that very soon, in many societies where they still exist,
those who can't bear public breastfeeding will die out, and this discussion will be
unnecessary. In fact, on the "Have Your Say" forum I originally cited, most posters
strongly supported a breastfeeding dyad's right to be anywhere other people are free to
be.
As a scholar, I have always been less interested in taking sides than I have been in
understanding what fuels debates, as well as what can be learned by getting inside the
perspectives of those on all sides of issues. As a human being, I do, of course, take
sides, but I always strive to understand my adversary. I guess I ask these questions in
the spirit of that inquisitiveness.
Kerry Ose
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