There are some points I've made before, about how we talk about nursing, 
and I feel it's appropriate to mention them again, in terms of the 
current discussions on the Nova Scotia posters.  The points are mostly 
to do with using the word 'discreet', and what we do to ourselves, when 
we choose this word over others, when discussing nursing.

I feel it's appropriate to raise it as there are several strands to 
conversations, that are actually discussing complex processes, and I 
think it's useful to open out those processes more fully.

To those of us who have expressed concern about the posters being too 
indiscreet, and how they put a lot of work into reassuring mothers about 
not having to expose breasts, I'd like to reframe those statements as an 
experiment in language:

"I spend a lot of time supporting mothers in helping them feel safe 
about nursing.  Our area is very condemning of the human body, and many 
mothers feel anxious about feeling vulnerable, threatened or exposed 
when nursing their infants.  So we do a lot of work on how they can 
nurse their infants in a way that makes them feel safe."

Vs

"I teach mothers to nurse discreetly.  There's absolutely no need to 
expose a breast or nipple when nursing a baby."

To my mind the second statement doesn't say very much about what the 
issues are, and how we are helping mothers with those issues.  Nursing 
your newborn is (often) a time of feeling exposed, fragile and 
vulnerable.  Learning 'how to do it' is a fraught time for new mothers, 
I know, I was one recently, and one where we do need support to help 
nurse in ways that make us feel safe and comfortable.  Every mother who 
needs that support, deserves to have it.

However, my point is, that this is entirely different from making 
statements about discreetness.  As I have said previously, as soon as we 
choose to use the word 'discreet', we raise the spectre of the 
indiscreet mother, whipping it all out, regardless of sensibilities.  A 
powerful spectre of intolerance about a women's body.  A spectre who 
allows base language to be used against women's bodies.  A spectre, who 
haunts the debates on nursing openly.  My point is we should stop 
inviting this spectre by choosing not to use the word.

It also hides what the issue actually is.  For the issue isn't how much 
breast is exposed, it's how hostile our culture is to both women's 
bodies, and nursing infants via that body.  And when we try and 'hide' 
the breast in order to apologise for nursing our infants, we feed into 
that culture.  We need to stop apologising.  "Discreet" is a word of 
apology.

If we choose not to use the word, we end up having to name what the 
issues actually are.  We have to start talking about safety, threat, 
feeling intimidated and exposed.  An emotional exposure, only 
tangentially linked to a physical one.  We have to acknowledging we are 
talking about genuine anxiety about being condemned for nursing.  There 
is no sliding scale of 'acceptable' nursing (discreet) and 'not 
acceptable' (indiscreet).  There is only how safe and secure each mother 
feels in each situation.

I hope I've made it clear that I'm talking abut the use of a word, not 
the need to help and support mothers by allowing them to nurse as they 
choose to.  I'm presuming that all of you who have spoken out against 
the posters have done so from a genuine feeling that, in your own 
situation, they may not be helpful; as the level of anxiety already 
present in your local culture might result in counter productive 
reactions to it.  This is an extremely valid point, and one size does 
not fit all.  The very fact that they are designed for Nova Scotia, says 
much about Nova Scotia!  It would be ridiculous to suggest they were 
perfect for every culture and location, just because I liked them!  :-)  
There is an issue of making official representation about what should be 
acceptable - but others have dealt with that wonderfully! 

However, if you were genuinely left feeling that those posters offended 
you - as opposed to might make your job harder - then you need a reality 
check.  This is the year 2007, and the right of a women to nurse her 
infant in the fashion displayed in these posters has been established a 
thousand million times: deal with it. 

And finally, as always, I feel the personal need to point out that every 
time you choose to talk about teaching mothers to nurse discreetly (as 
opposed to supporting them in nursing safely and comfortably) and when 
you talk about how easy it is to be 'discreet' - you condemn so many 
infants to premature weaning.  For no mother can nurse an active 2 year 
old 'discreetly'.  Every time you say "It's easy not to expose a breast" 
you make comment on how it's _right_ not to expose a breast, and condemn 
mothers to feeling that nursing has to cease when the infant is old 
enough to makes its own statement.  Would it be such a huge stretch to 
say "Here's ways to nurse that might make you feel safer." as opposed to 
saying "Here's how to nurse discreetly."?

Mother of nursing toddlers everywhere, would thank you for using the 
former, and avoiding the latter.

Morgan Gallagher
Online Lactaneer
Still nursing her 29 month old son, despite the occasional flash of nipple

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