Lori asks us about breastfeeding your toddlers.
Well Lori, all I can tell you, is that a first time Mum, currently still
nursing almost 33 month old toddler, everything you've read about the
benefits in your references are just so true!
But aside from all the a good science stuff, about the continued brain
building properties of my milk, about how it adjusts fats to meet my
toddlers needs etc - there is a whole range of other stuff that doesn't
often get mentioned. I sort of put it under 'mothering' in my head, or
'parenting', as raising a breastfeeding toddler is just so much easier
with Mama's Milk. All those bumps and frustrations and tantrums that
cannot be avoided - Mama's Magic Milk heals all. When fevers strike,
and sick toddlers refuse all but comfort - Mama's Magic Milk comes to
the rescue. My son recently had a10 days of sustained fever, vomiting
and diarohhea - and he escaped hospitalisation because of Mama's Magic
Milk. Without it, he'd had been on a drip in hospital, with me frantic
in the chair beside him. I reminded myself of this when I felt
exhausted by constantly nursing him to see him throw up or when I was
smelling what was exploding out the other end. No matter how hard it
was to keep holding him, and nursing him almost constantly, it would
have been so much worse to be trapped in a hospital chair beside as he
lay with a drip in his arm.
My son inherited my small ear canals - nursing him still saves him from
painful ear infections, as the action of suckling helps him keep
everything clearer. He's escaped anti-biotics many times - because he
was nursing. My doctor has trusted me several times, on giving the ear
infections a bit more time to clear naturally... as I knew nursing was
his best chance of getting away with it.
And on top of the huge biological benefts to me - the ceasing of my
menstrual cycle for two and a half years after he was born, and the
constant Joy Juice I get from his nursing, and the extra protection from
breast cancer I'm receiving - there are the huge psychological benefits
both of us are reaping. The sheer level of day to day skin to skin
close bonding we get, the continued dance between the two of us as we
negotiate boundaries on my breasts and his needs as he ages, seeing the
glow in his face as I fill him up with comfort on bad days .. it's just
sheer joy. Lying in a drowsy daze of a morning, and feeling him nuzzle
and latch on in his sleep - following the same pattern on baby led
latching he did when he was one minute old - is just awesome. It's less
awesome when he's all night nursing again due to illness or fever - but
again, I skip in my head to what I'm being saved! I see his sense of
safety, and security, and joy in life, develop as he nurses. He knows
he has magic milk to return to, and he feels save and warm and loved. I
know he has magic milk to soothe him, and I look at the perfection of
his body and marvel that I made it that way! No matter what the future
holds for him, I know I'm giving him the best I possibly can, for him to
respond to both the physical, and emotional, needs of his future. And
that fulfills me in so many ways.
No panic for this toddler mother when fussy eating habits kicked in! No
worry about how little, or how much he eats, or when he only eats the
bread, or only eats the meat! I don't have to worry one jot about
anything in his diet - for between my milk and the bits he does eat -
he's fine. No swapping 'tricks and secret's with other mothers for "how
to get them to eat" for me. No forcing him to eat when he doesn't want
to - no clearing of plates 'or else'. Food is a totally relaxed event
in this household - even if we have to strip him naked to survive the
spectacle of him eating his own body weight in spaghetti bolognese. (We
run the bath before we sit down to eat)
And there is nothing quite so laughter filled in the Universe, as the
sound of a toddler playing 'boob raspberries' on his mother's breast.
When his sense of joy overspills him to the point where he blows down on
me and makes ffarrrumping noises, and me and his Dad dissolve into
helpless giggles. :-) Or the shared joke I have with my hubby, about
my litte boy's nightime latching on to my bum - or my husband's bum - as
he once more latched utterly in his sleep, and simply snuffled around
warm flesh until something soft and round came his way! It is just
amazing watching that hardwired behaviour still in action nearly three
years later.
And lest you think I'm some super dooper lactation Goddess.
Breastfeeding did nothing for me for a whole nine months: it was just
what I did to feed my baby. At about the nine months mark, he became
physically active enough for me to _see_ what it meant to him. I fell
in love with nursing him because of the joy and contentment I saw
written on his body, and on his face, and in his eyes. Having seen what
it meant to him, how could I not fall in love with it too? Only this
amount of love could have gotton me through the "throw the baby through
the wall" stages of touched out and burned out! It's not always easy,
but it is always worth it. It has put me in touch with my own power as
a woman, and as a mother: the ultimate expression of feminist
liberation. (As a wonderful breastfeeding icon now puts it "My
superpower is making milk, what's yours?")
My little boy came as a happy and relaxed bundle of 'sunflower' baby.
He still nurses all through the day, and quite a lot at night. It's
just what he does: it's his joy. It's mine too. And I never thought
I'd even understand that, never mind feel it. My husband, having
witnessed this shared joy first hand, is as passionate as I am about
continuing to give our son my milk - for as long as he needs it.
I'm so happy that I rejected Western Premature Weaning, and went for
normal nursing patterns. Sure, there are some days when I wish he was a
bit more like the more common pattern of 33 month olds - and nursed a
lot less! But mostly, I just thank the Gods we're still in this state
of primal conjoining. It will be a sad and sorry day for this mother,
when her infant moves off without her. :-( I'm already planning a
weaning ceremony, so I can grieve fully for what I'm losing, as well as
rejoice for what I've gained in my wonderful son.
Feel free to quote me. :-) I am aware that I have become "one of
those women" - the ones you avoid as they're still doing that crazy
breastfeeding stuff, and _revelling_ in it! ;-)
Morgan Gallagher
Lori Passwater wrote:
> Hello, my name is Lori Passwater and I am a nursing student with Ivy Tech
> College. We are currently in our Maternal-Child class and discussing
> breastfeeding. I am really interested in the topic of mothers breastfeeding
> their toddlers. .... I am interested to hear any
> other opinions on this subject.
>
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