I haven't managed to read all the posts on this subject yet, as I have a bit 
of a back log.

Two things to add:  :-)

I was sexually abused as a child, and then entered into a terribly abusive 
first relationship which took some years to escape from.  Now, when I fell 
pregnant, a couple of decades and a lot of therapy later, it never occurred 
to me to not breastfeed prior to the birth.  In hindsight, this was more to 
do with how I ignored my body than anything else.  There have been dark 
flashes and moments during nursing, esepcially at night, when I've been 
exhausted.  However - and this is why I'm bringing my own story to this post 
- breastfeeding has undoubtedly been the most healing experience in my life. 
  I may have had a few dark flashes, but they are small and puny, compared 
to the great joy I've found in my body, and my innate trust in it to nourish 
my baby.  In fact, it's taken over 40 years to realise that I'd been utterly 
divorced from my body, and nursing my  infant has re-connected me to it.  I 
offer this insight, in case any of you happen to be in a place where it's 
appropriate to say to another mother who has been abused, and is wondering 
what effect breastfeeding might have.  Breastfeeding can heal such pains.

Secondly, and this one will make you all smile, we recently had a pregnant 
woman come online in search of advice for exclusive pumping and bottle 
feeding of EBM.  She had a very particular physical acuteness in her 
breasts.  Any contact, even with clothing, made her shrink.  She had to be 
careful about getting dressed and had spent a lifetime developing techniques 
to avoid any contact with them.   She'd come online to seek help, as she'd 
come across negative reactions from the health professionals around her when 
she'd said she wanted to exclusively pump, and she wanted to be armed with 
all she needed for the birth and afterwards.  She got everything she neeed, 
and also went off to the pumping groups for more.

She very thoughtfully returned weeks later, to share what had happened.  She 
explained she'd given birth, and everyone had been briefed that baby was to 
have expressed colostrum etc and all had gone well.  Until she'd woken up in 
bed when her milk came in, sat bolt upright, felt what was happening in her 
breasts and screamed "Bring me a baby NOW!"  Baby was brought and baby 
reduced her discomfort.  A happy and fulfilling nursing relationship was 
born.  :-)

Morgan Gallagher
Online Lactaneer
Nursing 28 month old toddler, who know Mummy's breasts belong to Mummy - he 
just gets to borrow them a lot

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