Nikki writes:
"This discussion about mothers that choose to pump leads me to wonder
if
it is mothering that we are fighting for, more than breastfeeding."
I think this is such an important issue. Breastfeeding is an innate
aspect of mothering, but is not an innate aspect of childcare. I think
that we as LCs are partially responsible--in our eagerness to jump on
the "breast is best" bandwagon, we have become pawns in a very
competent marketing strategy to make human milk a commodity, a product
of lactation, just as the fetus is a product of gestation. So many of
the issues discussed recently play into this. Exclusive pumping is
indeed becoming more common and has been for at least ten years.
Whenever the bar gets pushed like this, we are all quick to think of
the moms who would never have been able to bf or provide milk to their
babies w/o this alternative. We are so humbled by adoptive moms, moms
of sick babies, moms who have mechanical problems with feeding at the
breast and so on who have toughed out a grueling pumping schedule b/c
they love their babies so very much. Most of us have friends--women we
love who have had to do so (I have a good friend who is a doc who
exclusively pumped for a preemie after trying very hard to feed at
breast).
Yet, whenever we see these trends, we need to be careful not to circle
too much around these examples and remember the bigger picture. We are
quick to be politically-correct and understand the difficult
situations. But, most of the moms I work with who consider exclusive
pumping are able to bf, but are quick to throw in the towel, seeing
pumping as a viable alternative to feeding at the breast, NOT to AIM.
Women have so many conflicting feelings when bf is a struggle and
pumping often allows them to push these feeling aside. The further
tragedy is that most will wean from the pump within days or weeks and
bf will end altogether.
While I do believe that we have numerous cultural barriers to
successful bf'ing, I think we also have to be careful here. I worked
for 4 years with the poorest women in one of the poorest cities in the
US. At the time, our claim to fame was the highest incidence of teen
pregnancy in the US. In spite of barriers beyond belief, we achieved
very high bf rates among our moms. I think that our attitudes about
what we value has more to do with bf rates than cultural barriers do.
When a woman's sense of self is deeply rooted in mothering, she will
make different choices than when it is not. Having other women around
her who value her as a mother has a huge impact on her, whereas having
others value her more in other roles will also have an impact.
As Nils Bergman reminds us, babies breastfeed, not mothers--we simply
have to provide our presence and I would also suggest our willingness.
I firmly believe mothers are far more willing and able when they birth
normally and when their instincts are intact. When I teach prenatal
bf--it's always about meeting the physiologic needs of the infant.
Proper latch, etc is irrelevent by comparison. So, back to the original
concept--it's about mothering, IMO. When responsive mothering happens,
bf'ing is likely to happen, too.
Jennifer Tow, IBCLC, CT, USA
Intuitive Parenting Network LLC
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