Here's my "talkback" post in response to reaction to the article Pam sent a
link to earlier today
(http://onmilwaukee.com/family/articles/motherfest44.html?7538 ). I
haven't had time to read Ms. Flowers' article yet, but the "lay people" who
responded to the article I did were spouting things just as ridiculous,
apparently, so it's relevant.
Talkback:
"<http://onmilwaukee.com/family/articles/motherfest44.html>Motherfest:
Public breastfeeding, what's the big deal?"
mom2six
As a mom of six, I have nursed my babies anywhere and everywhere. Here are
a few points to consider:
1) If I hear one more time someone referring to public nursing as "whipping
it out" or comparing it to a man whipping out his penis, I am going to
scream. I have NEVER "whipped it out" and have only once in my life seen
such a careless display. If a mom and baby know what they are doing,
blanket or not, no one can even tell the breast is "whipped out". I never
used a blanket while nursing, public or not, and I looked no different to
an observer than a mom cradling her child! A woman who exposes her breast
in public for the second it takes for baby to latch on cannot in the
furthest stretch be compared to a man swinging his penis around during a
conversation. What an idiot the person who said that is.
2) For breast-feeding advocates to say that public nursing "should be" no
different than public bottle-feeding is a bit ridiculous. I am an advocate,
obviously, but I'm trying to focus the issue here. Of course it is
different. The debate about nursing in public is not about the benefits of
breast milk (that's a whole other argument). It is about people feeling
uncomfortable seeing a thin segment of skin when the part below it is in
baby's mouth. Of course people don't feel uncomfortable seeing a bottle in
a baby's mouth. Right or wrong, the issue is that people, even some
breast-feeding mothers, unfortunately, see the breast as something sexual.
Let's face it; a bottle serves one purpose only. Breast serve two. It is a
wasted argument to go on and on about how feeding a baby is what they were
made for. They are also a sexual feature, and the same women who
breast-feed their children and advocate for it enjoy having breast as part
of their sexiness. Women who have to have mastectomies do not mourn loosing
their breasts because they've lost a food source. Let's not combine
arguments. We advocates can't prove a point by pounding in our point of
view and ignoring that there are legitimate issues to work through.
3) I think anyone would agree, if they are honest, that a shrieking child
gets very nerve-racking, very quickly. The same people who are so mortified
when a woman sits down WHEREVER to nurse their baby would be the ones to
GLARE at said mother if she didn't do "something" to calm the child. What
are we mom's to do? We are expected to leave in the middle of whatever we
are doing to feed and/or comfort the baby through nursing. We are expected
to leave if the child is screaming and disturbing the people around us.
Shall we stay home, barefoot and pregnant?
5) I wonder what the reaction would be if new moms Britney Spears or Heidi
Klum sat down on a mall bench to breast-feed their babies. Hmm......(by the
way, Heidi did breast-feed her last baby, who is 16 months old and will be
nursing this one!)
6) For the people who try to argue that public breast-feeding is an
invasion of the rights of others around you, I wonder if you also consider
it an invasion if someone comes up and blows a mouth-full of cig. smoke in
your or your child's face. If you consider it the same, what a shame. A
baby nursing does not negatively impact the well-being of ANYONE around
them. If you don't consider it the same, good for you, and then think more
carefully about calling public nursing an "invasion of my space and rights".
Like others have said, if you don't like what you see, don't look. In MOST
cases, women are overly discreet, as they should be in a society where
people have nothing better to do than gauk. In Italy, there are not "nude
beaches". Sprawled out across EVERY beach are topless women. No one bats an
eye. No one stares. Bare breasts are normal there. They are just another
part of the female body. For societal change to occur, people have to allow
for the "radicals" to do what they do (as long as it does not physically
hurt others) until it is considered normal. Just think, in some countries
women still can't even show their face. We've come a long way here. Let's
not live in the dark, oppressed ages!
Beth, mom of six, including a 22 month old who still nurses anywhere she
needs or wants to without making a scene. A life-saver on a recent 6 hour
flight!!!
"When in despair, remember that all through history the way of truth and
love has always won; there have been tyrants and murderers, and for a time
they can seem invincible, but in the end they always fall." Gandhi
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