I am far from an expert on premie feeding, but I would think that the
breastmilk from the adoptive mother, with fortifier, is probably the best
thing possible for this baby. I asked Dr. Newman about this kind of thing,
a while back, and he said that premies didn't necessarily need fortifier,
but I certainly wouldn't know how to elaborate on what situations it would
or wouldn't be needed. If this mom has been able to increase her milk
production by adding pumping to nursing her bio baby, I would think that the
composition of her milk would tend be more like a bio mom of a younger baby,
but not like that of the mother of a newborn. Some adoptive mothers have
some amount of secretion that resembles colostrum, and some don't, but I
haven't heard of this happening except in someone who was starting to induce
lactation from a point of not having been lactating at all.
Does the adoptive mother have physical access to this baby? In the past,
adoptive parents were often not even identified until a baby who needed to
be in the NICU was ready for release from the hospital. However, I think
most people, in general, now have more understanding for the need for a sick
newborn to have a parent there, whether the birth parent or adoptive
parents. Two of mine were in the NICU. I did get to see Thomas twice,
there, but only for an hour each time. Fortunately, the nurses at the
Landstuhl US Army Med Center's NICU were WONDERFUL! I have always felt like
the love and affection they showered on this little biracial baby, who had
arrived there just about at death's door, with no one asking about him,
played a part in his remarkable recovery! With my daughter, Julia, I never
even got to see her until she was six months old. Her birth parents had
rarely visited her in the hospital, during her first four months. After
they decided to give her up, the social workers saw no reason to try to get
her placed for adoption in any hurry, although we were right there ready for
her. I believe that, had I been able to be with her from birth, her
recovery would have been so much easier that she would have needed only one
traumatic surgical procedure, rather than three!
Getting off track here, but I am just thrilled whenever I hear of some sick
newborn who is being placed for adoption being able to have the love (and
even the milk!) of an adoptive mother. This mom would be more than welcome
to join the discussion at ABRW (www.fourfriends.com/abrw) . One of the
photos on the home page of that site is of a mom tandem nursing both a bio
toddler and an adopted baby, the fact of which is obvious, because the
babies are two different races!
Please give this mom my regards, too!
Darillyn
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