I am a few days late, but wanted to comment on the mom who was physically
unable to produce milk, but was interested in feeding at the breast. Of all
the adoptive moms I have been in contact with over the years, the majority
have produced a significant amount of milk, just from nursing with a
supplementer. However, there have been a few, none of whom had been
pregnant, who stuck with it for a significant period, but could never see
that they were producing so much as a drop of milk. What tends to happen,
with those who keep nursing, without milk, is that after a period of
diappointment over the lack of milk, they learn to shift their focus,
almost entirely, to the nurturing aspects of breastfeeding, and become the
only person in the baby's life who can provide that level of nurturing. I
have always found these women to be a tremendous inspiration! I don't know
if it is known that this mom will definitely not be able to produce any milk
at all but, if she can go into with the attitude that it is going to be a
rewarding experience, just for the nurturing benefits, if she does produce
some, it will tend to be seen as a bonus!
Anyway, I think the mom of this topic will very much enjoy nurturing her
baby at her breast, and her baby most certainly will! I would suggest that
she might check into the Lact-Aid, as well as the SNS. For moms who need to
use a supplementer for every feeding, for a long period of time, the
Lact-Aid is far more user friendly. There are lots of reasons, including
being much easier to get set up to nurse with, and also to nurse with
discretely in public. A few others are that it is much easier to adequately
clean, easier to use without tape and that the bulk of it, which is less
than the SNS, even when full, is almost nothing when it is empty. It is
very easy to go around wearing an empty Lact-Aid, without noticing it. It
is important for a mom who needs to use a supplementer on a regular basis to
be able to get into a routine that she can keep up without having to put
alot of work or concern into it.
I think I understand what this mom would have meant, that she was OK with
formula, rather than going to great lengths to get donated breast milk. I,
for one, used mostly formula to supplement my milk supply. With each of my
kids, there was someone who donated a little bit of EBM, like enough for
four ounces or so a day. I felt good about being able to offer my babies a
mixed diet of breast milk and formula. It wasn't that I thought formula was
just as good, but that, considering the situation, it was the best of the
options I had. Of course, I would have loved to be able to provide 100%
breast milk, but I would have driven myself nuts, had I taken the attitude
that what I providing was far inferior. I believe that formula provided at
the breast offers significant benefits over formula provided in a bottle,
and have seen the act of nurturing at the breast transform many little ones
whose early lives have been traumatic. The benefits are both physical and
emotional, and often not dependant on there being milk coming from the
breast.
I would invite this mom to visit ABRW, www.fourfriends.com/abrw , and wish
her the best!
Darillyn
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