>In einer eMail vom 22-5-04 10:39:05 West-Europa (zomertijd) schreibt
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>
>
>>  I agree, Gonneke, that we can't 'make' women feel anything. But their
>>  bad feelings of resentment, disappointment, anger and so on, are
>>  translated by many into 'guilt'....and the 'wrong' sort of bf
>>  education can certainly increase that.
>>
>
>Yes, you're right. But that is what I will dicuss with parents and explain.
>I will repeat and rephrase what I sense their feelings are and direct them
>into the "whose is the guilt?" question and the "What exactly is it that you
>feel?". That is imo the counseling side of the job.


Yes....I do that, too.

My concern is that (here, anyway) that many (most?) mothers with bf
problems never encounter support that really empowers them to
understand where the 'fault' should lie....they may feel they are bad
mothers or failures, and often become very defensive with
breastfeeding supporters as a result. Campaigns that encourage women
to breastfeed without the infrastructure that supports them with
real, practical solutions to problems when they decide to do so - and
it is very counter-cultural to breastfeed in many parts of the UK -
actually do increase guilt.

Of course the guilt is misplaced. But the mothers don't know that!

Heather Welford Neil
NCT bfc, UK

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