<I think that if we met a new bride who said "I find the idea of sex
distasteful" we wouldn't suggest to her that she find "alternate methods"
for her husband and plan to conceive through artificial insemination. We
would help her find the psychological roots of her problem (not
personally,
but perhaps through therapy) because we feel that having a sexual
relationship with her husband would enhance both of their lives.>

Great analogy, Teresa.

I have been relating to this thread as it unfolds. While I didn't have
this attitude toward sex, (at least by 16 when I was hoping for romance
and my first kiss!) I was, as someone said, brought up in the days when
bottles were propped and holding, etc. was discouraged for fear of
spoiling the child, so skin contact wasn't abundant in my developing
years. I think this may have been one reason why I found "hands-on"
nursing care so rewarding when I entered training, for as we know from
Ashley Montague, touch changes brain chemistry.

My breastfeeding experiences with my first three children ended at 5 days
when I couldn't hack the nipple pain and damage, despite my intellectual
certainty that it was the best route for the babies. With my 4th child
and a lot of help from a personal friend who was a LLL counselor, I
finally got over the hump and off to a very rewarding experience. But it
felt "odd" at times during those first days and weeks to overcome this
feeling and build new feelings that removed it all from the intellectual
realm. I too, credit the hormonal rewards. I then began to feel I had
been gypped out of something with my other children, because the whole
process changed me profoundly as a person. It changed my relationships
with my children and my husband, and my ability to relate to other people
in general.

Jean
*********
K. Jean Cotterman RNC, IBCLC
Dayton, OH USA

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