Where I live, new mothers define their proficiency at breastfeeding by
whether they can BF in a café.  This does not mean 'discreetly' concealing
the fact that they are BF.  It means being so laid back that you just whip
out a breast and plug it into the baby without losing a drop of your
capuccino.  The mothers who struggle with latch, or who are using shields,
not to mention the ones who are dependent on pumping, just feel too awkward
and clumsy to BF in public, so they lay low until they are good enough at
it.

Last week I had several contacts with a mother whose baby had lost a large
amount of weight before learning to latch.  She was finger feeding to get
baby turned around and gaining, and gradually challenging her with a breast
more and more.  Last time I saw her I said jokingly she'd be ready to go to
the café in just a few more days.  She told me she'd already been... and
then I heard about DISCREET.  She'd zipped out to the ladies' room,
expressed her milk quickly with the hand pump she carried in her bag, and
returned to her husband and baby, and they finger fed the baby without
anyone noticing.  For her this was a real victory - she had enough energy to
get out of the house despite the fact that she was having to pump on cue
every time the baby was hungry.

Also last week I met an immigrant woman who felt very uncomfortable
breastfeeding when anyone else was around.  Her husband had gotten her a BF
cape and she was so happy!  I was astounded that this tent-like piece of
cloth, which is bound to attract much more attention and curious looks here
than simply feeding the baby would, gave her the safety she needed to keep
BF.  But if she's happy, then I'm not complaining.  I won't reveal where she
was from, let's just say it isn't a country where women have to wear burkas
or can't vote.

Things are far from perfect here.  But breastfeeding is still the norm, and
I do so appreciate that.  Women here don't breastfeed because it's the best,
at least not primarily.  They breastfeed because in most cases it's the
easiest.  I've lost track of how many mothers who have been involuntary
bottle feeders previously, have given the inconvenience of bottle feeding as
their strongest motivator for getting BF to succeed the next time around.

Rachel Myr
Kristiansand, Norway
trying to restrain myself from posting any more today

             ***********************************************

To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail
To start it again: set lactnet mail (or digest)
To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet
All commands go to [log in to unmask]

The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned
LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM)
mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to:
http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html