Dear Lena, thank you for your note on Lactnet this morning.
From: Lena <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: Bottles and Breast Feeding
To: [log in to unmask]
Precedence: list
Speaking as a new mom, this aversion to the bottle and staunch support of
only breastfeeding is what disappoints me when speaking with lactation
consultants. I worked with 4 separate IBCLC Lactation Consultants with my
child. My son has a very high palate. This obstacle along with the fact
that I had to return to work at 4 weeks post partum, led me to bottle feed
my son. I now exclusively pump for him and have done so successfully for
5 months. "
Sounds like you have been working hard to provide milk for your son. You
should be proud of this effort, as you obviously have been working to
provide milk and also working full time as well. It is not easy. I also
hear that you feel judged, which is unfortunate. It is not the job of the
IBCLC to judge anyone....that is for certain. With challenges like you
had, I am sure you would have appreciated a more supportive system of LCs
behind you.
"He is a happy, healthy, well developed little boy. Not the
subject of over feeding or any deficiencies. He is in the 100th
percentile for height and weight and is standing and crawling. He has had
100% breast milk since the day he was born. "
This is something to be proud of......I believe you are referring to my
comment about overfeeding....in bottlefed babies,as the basis of your
comment here. I was speaking in generalities and referring to the many
mothers I work with online who have experienced overfeeding and subsequent
loss of supply......
"What was disheartening about this experience was the LACK of support from
the lactation consultant community. The minute I decided to excluively
pump breast milk for my son rather than breastfeed, all 4 LC's sent me on
my way. "
Did you ask for further support from these professionals? I wonder what
their response would have been if you had said that you had decided to
exclusively pump, and that you wished for further support? What would have
been most supportive at that time? You were pumping milk
consistently....were you experiencing supply problems, or did you just want
continuing contact as a means of support. I sense some defensiveness in
your comments, and am very interested in what the dynamic was for you in
this instance?
"Yes, moms who pump part time or exclusively do have perceived, if not
actual supply issues. Unfortunately, it is difficult for them to find
support from lactation professionals as they are not breast feeding."
It is my experience that helping mothers with supply issues is one of the
key responsibilities of any IBCLC, and there are a lot of resources out
there to deal with this, ...at the disposal of mothers and IBCLCs. Perhaps
the IBCLC involved sometimes feels that she has failed if the mother
chooses to bottlefeed, or perhaps she feels that her job is done, and that
the mother no longer wishes to pay for continuing consults? In my area,
consults (personal, one on one, not online) are a pay-for service, and most
mothers who are exclusively pumping would not wish to pay for continuing
support time....many mothers in early stages of breastfeeding difficulties
are not even willing to pay for services...though they are often willing to
pay for formula. This perplexes me, as you can imagine, but it is a
mindset that is not uncommon where I live.
" I believe the LC community needs to broaden their approach and be more
accepting of moms who choose or have to feed this way. "
And of course, this is individual. There are some doctors who are better
than others at certain things....such as supporting breastfeeding mothers,
while others have skill in other areas but not this. You are right.
Judgement is not the LCs job.
"Would you rather that moms go to formula because of the lack of support
and education? Any breast milk is better than none at all and LC's need to
support and
eduate moms regardless of how they choose to feed their child."
It is not what the IBCLC wants that is crucial here. It is the job of the
IBCLC to support the mother with accurate information and
assistance. Sometimes, in doing so, with even the most delicate technique,
and manner, the mother reacts explosively, defending herself and feeling
judged, even when no judgement was intended. She is her own judge, and
jury....and perceives that she herself has failed because of the set of
circumstances. The fact is that the mothers in this situation have been let
down by society and by our "system,"...they have been subjected to birth
practices that are inhuman, and not supported by any evidence whatsoever in
terms of safety. They are unsupported after birth in their breastfeeding,
and they then return to work and are not welcome to bring babies or to
pump, often. It is a lose-lose situation for many mothers. They have been
dumped by a system that is not fit.
I strongly recommend that you refer to another group called
www.pumpingmoms.org. It is a group with over 1000 members, women who pump
full and part time and come together for support and education. It is the
BEST resource for moms who pump given the lack of support in the LC
community. "
We here on Lactnet are intimately aware of this group, and it has been
recommended before. Thank you for bringing it to our attention again.
I wanted to ask you if you currently work with lactating women...as I
noticed that you posted on Lactnet as a new mother. Lactnet is a forum for
professionals, although we welcome others who wish to read and learn to
listen in on the interesting and varied discussions.
Many thanks for joining in, and please feel free to write back. Kathleen
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