Fiona,

       I want to thank you for reminding me that not everyone is as easygoing
on the phone as I am.  People who know me will have a hard time believing
that I overcame a pretty strong case of "shyness"  I was really lucky to have
the parents that I had.  My dad had a particularly strong lesson.  When I
would be upset about being passed up for something, or when I did not get
something because I was expecting someone to know what I needed through
osmosis, my dad would say, "If you don't ask--you don't get!"  As a result, I
became a fairly assertive person.  I understand what you are saying, and I
feel that it is very sad that many women are not assertive enough to get the
help that they need.  I have had women call me and ask for pump rental
information, particularly during serious engorgement.  After I provide the
information, she says, "I will have to ask my husband."  I just want to
cringe when I hear that...  Usually what that means is that her husband will
decide that the pump is too expensive, and while she suffers through
engorement, he will go out and get the cheapest pump he can get at Wal-Mart!
The most frustrating part of what we do is dealing with situations like
these.  However, I think the point that I was trying to make was:  We still
must NOT personally take the responsibility when the mother is not assertive.
 We cannot be held accountable for every mother who does not get the help she
needs, and we need to be careful about blaming others in our circle--LLL
Leaders, CLCs, and IBCLCs alike--who may not get to every mom.  There
certainly aren't enough of us, and we need to support eachother.

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