Barry,
I should first make it clear that I have no medical background, just a history of allergies and allergy shots and a story similar to yours.  I'll pound on this point below, but a good allergist is really important you would do well to spend some time finding one. 
 
My middle son, Jesse, has been keeping bees with me for about 4 years (he's almost 15 now) and has gotten a dozen or so stings in that time.  He never had any reaction other than local pain for 10-20 minutes until a few weeks ago when he had an episode like the one you described for your son.  Jesse also ended up in the hospital with epinephrine subQ and a benadryl IV drip for several hours to stabilize his pulse and breathing and to get rid of hives (the rash, of course, not the boxes. He gave the boxes to his sister the next week.)  We have started him on shots with a local allergist and expect it to take a couple of years to get him to where he could safely keep bees again if he wants to.
 
It's really important to get a good allergist to handle this.  I've had allergy shots for hayfever 2 different times several years apart.  The first was with a doctor who aparently didn't know what he was doing and it never helped at all.  The second time was remarkably effective.  Quiz your doctor until you feel confident that he or she is going to do the right thing.  Find out what provisions are on hand if a bad reaction were to happen. (My doctor's front door is 75 feet from the emergency room entrance to the local hospital.)  Be prepared to wait a half hour at the doctor's office after each shot to be sure there isn't a reaction.
 
The principle involved with the shots is that you start with a dose too mild to cause a reaction.  Then gradually you increase the dose, always staying just barely under the reaction threshold until you are taking a dose that wold kill a horse so to speak.
With the effective treatments that I took, the first dose was almost as clear as water and very small - just a few drops.  By the time I finished it was dark brown and about a tablespoon by volumn.  One word of caution in discussing this with allergists though.  There is a school of allergy therapy that always uses tiny weak doses and never pushes your tolerance level.  It has a spotty track record and you want to steer clear of it.  That school of thought is fond of the term "threshold" and the word is a red flag with most reputable allergists.  In the right hands, desensitization will probably work very well for your son.  I don't know if his age is a factor or not.
 
Jesse and I have also had to make a few adjustments in our beekeeping practices.  He has stopped altogether for the course of his allergy shots, and I've made a few changes.  We don't keep bees at home any more, including the observation hive from his room.   I'm also trying to figure out where to store unused equipment to minimize the curious bee flights around the back yard. There are still bees around, and that's a good thing ( let's not lose our perspective here!)  They are no more out to get Jesse than they were before, and if we keep the epi-pen handy and take reasonable precautions, everything should be fine.  We aren't doing anything extreme like pulling out the bushes in the yard that bees like (My wife was thinking about it) because if the shots work, and they almost always do if done right, this will be a temporary problem. On the other hand, we've put any plans to plant really excellent bee forage on hold for a while. 
 
The other place I have had to rethink a few things is with my 4-H project.  I'm insured through 4-H but I don't relish the thought of someone else's kid having a similar problem on my watch.  I've taken this opportunity to remind the kids and their parents that ANYONE can develop a life threatening allergy to bees without warning like Jesse did.  For a couple of weeks after Jesse's episode, all the kids were sure they were having a severe reaction, some even without getting a sting!  (The mind is a wonderful thing.)
 
By the way, about one in 10,000 people have systemic life threatening allergies to honey bees.  And your doctor was probably right, the next one will probably be worse and quicker than the first, so shots are a really good idea.  LOTS more people swell up, and most of them think their swelling is life threatening.  (Unless you get a sting in the back of your throat it probably is not.)  My allergist assures me that the two reaction types are not at all predictive of each other.  For example, I swelled for a dozen years and never had a systemic reaction, but Jesse never swelled before developing the systemic reaction, and of course some people will have both reactions.
 
Keep your chin up, find a remote yard for your bees and don't panic.  Your son can get a bee sting any time, whther you keep bees or not, so don't carry the whole weight of the world on your shoulders about this.  Just get him the shots if he's old enough, make sensible adjustments, and put up with a few added inconveniences where necessary and it should work out fine.
Michael
 
----------
From:   Barry Birkey[SMTP:[log in to unmask]]
Sent:   Monday, July 21, 1997 5:15 PM
To:     [log in to unmask]
Subject:        Re: A lesson learned
 
Ted Wout wrote:
 
> And now for my question, how many bee stings is lethal?  I know that one
> bee sting can kill someone who is allergic.  I'm not allergic, I suffer bee
 
Hi Ted -
 
Thanks for sharing your interesting story. I had a couple of interesting experiences
myself this week along the same line. Friday, I got done with work early in the afternoon.
I left the job site at 1:00 and went home. When I walked in the house, My oldest and
youngest daughters were there but no wife and 7 year old son. When I asked for their
where-a-bouts, I was told that they were at the hospital. Not the kind of words a
father likes to hear! My daughter told me that my son had been stung on the foot and
had an allergic reaction.
 
I quickly changed and went to the hospital. When I got there, my son was sleeping and
looked pretty good. He was hooked up to an IV and heart monitor. It turns out that it
only took about 15 minutes for the allergic reaction to get to the serious stage. He had
hives over half his body, skin was bright red, eyes and mouth were swollen and he itched
all over. He has been stung by our honey bees several times before without much of a
reaction. I guess this time it put him over the top.
 
We now have two EpiPens on hand (one for here at the house and one to be with my
son when away from the house) and I was told by the doctor that the next sting will
more than likely have a worse reaction to him. I am now having to rethink my beekeeping
situation. I would be interested to know if anybody on the list has had a similer
experience to my son's and how have you coped with the allergy. Can one who has
developed an allergy to bee stings become desensitized? Has anyone experienced this?