My own personal experiences were that when my babies were born at home, my
visitors tended to be close friends who felt comfortable "invading" the
privacy of my home. They stayed short amounts of time, brought food, took
out my other children to play. My very best friend would get in bed with me,
and we'd lay there and laugh about the birth while my newborn nursed. I felt
very loved and secure. My doctor stayed until he was certain the baby was
breastfeeding well, and then he'd leave. The nurses stayed on for a few more
hours, writing their reports and feeding me. Since there were no
interventions, there were no real concerns, and since the baby was required
to breastfeed well before the doc left, the risk of hemorrhage was very low.
At the hospital, the nurses had a job to do, and since I'd had interventions
(cesarean, medications, anesthesia), they had to watch me. My visitors also
tended to be further reaching, and were there to visit, rather than say hi
and leave.
As a homebirth doula, I have very little interruption with the new family
after the baby is born. The first hour or so is pretty intense, but it
slopes off quickly. We make sure the baby is breastfeeding well, we bring
food and drinks to the parents, and answer the phone.
As a student nurse at the hospital, I always felt I was pestering the new
family, checking stitches, checking bleeding, checking vitals - hovering -
but, justified it as they nearly always had a lot of interventions, which
caused a lot of question marks in their care, and a higher risk of
complications. Still, although required, it seemed excessive. It seems the
parade of visitors is longer, the younger the mother. Our teen moms have
incredible numbers of friends who like to come by, and play the "who had the
most difficult birth" or "who had the biggest baby" competitions.
I laughingly recall the one interruption on the day my last child was born.
She was 2 weeks early, and a precipitous birth on the kitchen floor. A
grandmother-to-be called while we were cleaning up, very insistent on buying
a pump for her daughter, who wasn't due for another 6 weeks. I tried to
explain that I was busy, and wanted to get off the phone, but she kept on
and on. I finally raised my voice and told her I had JUST had a baby, and
couldn't help. She got even madder, and asked, "Exactly how long ago did you
have a baby?" I yelled, "TWO HOURS AGO!" and hung up the phone!
Best wishes,
Heather "Sam" Doak
<<
Nina asked:
I wonder if home-birth mothers feel 'interrupted' by visitors.>>
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