Hi Trish,
I'm hoping that since you had the blessings of the MOTL (mothers of the
list) to "seriously come out of the closet" with your question maybe
they will allow me the same blessing to answer your question.
Since its been quite a while since I've posted, and I've only been able
to read sporadically for several years now, due to life and home
responsibilities, I will reintroduce myself.
My name is Cheryl Leipold. I have been involved with helping
breastfeeding moms for about 15 years. I became board certified 10
years ago (yes I will be re-sitting the exam this year). I have been
involved with LACTNET almost since its beginning, mainly lurking but
adding input where I could here and there over the years. May I say to
the founding mothers BRAVO for such a forum. I am the mother of 11 (no
that is not a typo) breastfed children. I just turned 46 this March am
currently nursing a three year old and unfortunately looks like I am
losing a 2 month pregnancy as we speak.
The last time I had a chance to read LACTNET was about a week ago when I
read your post. My heart went out to you because of a similar
experience that I had with my 10th child. At that time I really had
nothing to say other than what has already been said, RAH-RAH-RAH, you
have already given that wonderful baby of yours everything that
breastfeeding has to offer even without him actually nursing at the
breast for very long, but I do understand your heartfelt desires for him
to go to the breast.
I will try to be brief in my explanation without leaving out too much
pertinent information. We had to decide to deliver my 10th child by
C-section at 27 weeks gestation November 12, 1997. The placenta had
stopped functioning and we had the choice of giving her a chance to make
it outside the womb or dying within a few hours. We chose to give her
every chance possible. She was born and 1 lb. 6.6 oz., was in the NICU
for approximately 3 months, did amazingly well considering her size and
also later finding out that she was also a baby with Downs Syndrome, but
might I say what a fighter!! We were very blessed that she had none of
the problems that can be so common in children with Downs and only some
of the problems that micro-premies have to face. With 9 other children
at home my husband and I traveled 45 minutes each way to visit her every
day. We did Kangaroo care with her almost every day from just a few
days old, in a hospital that we had to convince that WE WERE going to do
this for the benefit of our child. Her dad would Kangaroo her one day
for about an hour and the next day would be my turn. Any attempts at
the breast were encouraged, but she was so tiny that it was impossible
for her to even think of latching onto the nipple, and my nipples are
relatively small. I was nursing a three year old toddler at the time of
her birth and started pumping immediately but was never able to pump
more than a few ounces a day even with her sister continuing to nurse
(possibly a person who lays down the alveoli cells for nursing a new
child late in the pregnancy??).
When it became apparent that no matter what I did I was not going to
bring in a full milk supply for this baby, we convinced the
neonatologist (with educated effort and firmness) that our baby would
have banked human milk (thanks so much again Mary Rose Tully), the first
ever at this hospital. I pumped for five months and mixed my few ounces
a day with the banked milk at which time we went totally to the banked
milk until she was 15 months old.
Unfortunately this baby was force-fed bottles in the NICU and came home
totally orally defensive. She never effectively sucked anything but her
tongue to comfort herself which she still does to this day to go to
sleep. We tube fed her from 3 months, introduced solids very slowly and
carefully at 10 months while still tube feeding the banked milk and
eventually moving to all solids at 15 months.
When Miranda was 15 months old I delivered her brother (the 3 year old
nursing toddler now). At first she seemed interested in what the new
baby did at the breast and would climb up in by lap when he was nursing
and put her mouth to the breast to lick, play or bite. After a few
months the newness wore off and she would only want to put her mouth on
the breast every now and then. Most of the time she acted totally non
interested in what was going on. Miranda is now almost 4 1/2 yr. old.
Developmentally, in a lot of ways she is the same age as her brother.
Lately, although I am sure this is not the role play that she is taught
in her special ed. class at school, I have noticed her nursing her baby
dolls (there of course isn't anything else in the house to feed them
with). About a week ago she wanted to put her mouth on the breast for
the 1st time in over a year but she just laughed and got down.
Now for an answer to your question which I hope will give you hope that
anything is possible! Tonight as I lay down with Miranda and Jeremiah
to put them to sleep, Miranda decided that she didn't like Jeremiah
laying in my arms nursing while she just lay beside me. She wanted to
be held too. I offered for her to climb up on my chest and lay down.
Jeremiah was nursing on the right side and my left breast was slightly
exposed. Miranda latched on. At that time of course her brother
decided that he wanted that side so she happily switched. I figured
that would be it, but no, she latched on to the right side and sucked
(effectively most of the time) for about 5 minutes coming off and
reattaching herself like a pro several times. When her brother was
finished she went to the other breast and nursed there for about 2 or
three more minutes. Will it happen again? Who knows, but I can tell
you without a doubt that anything is possible.
What a blessed child your son is to have you as his mom!!
With love and best wishes,
Cheryl Leipold BS, IBCLC
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