I will never forget how worried I became of a mom who already had 2 kids in
school when she had a third (unexpected/unplanned).  Her comments to me were
that THIS baby was not going to affect her life and "hurt" the siblings...

Well, that was so...to the detriment of the new one, who was left whenever
possible with relatives so that the older ones would not have to "give up"
anything because of the new baby!  AND to the older siblings who didn't
learn the importance of respoding and being there for an infant!

"Normal" changes with every baby - and the NEW "normal" changes as each
child grows.  Anyone who doesn't want change needs our help in dealing with
it - and/or referrals to those who are trained in helping them.  

Just like I'm frustrated when I don't get a timely breastfeeding referral -
I try to be cognizant of the importance of getting a mom I see heading into
trouble to my own collaborators - the social worker I work with and the
Mental Health department in the next building...

Jeanette Panchula, BSW, (BACHELOR, not Masters in Social Work), RN, IBCLC
California, USA

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