Thank you, Jack, for bringing up again the issues about birthweight. In the
case of the Island baby (sounds like a TV mystery series!), it's clear that
the neighbour who took the mom & baby in & nursed the baby didn't need to
know the numbers or the percentage of wt. loss to see that someothing was
not right with the baby!  She LOOKED at the baby, and saw that all was not
well, and, being a sensible-sounding woman, did the logical thing and fed
the baby. And she must have been very concerned indeed for the welfare of
the baby to bring them into her home; she managed all this, presumably,
without medical degrees or advanced training in infant development - just
saw that something was wrong. Call it "instinct".

So I'm not at all surprised to hear from the update that now that the baby
is being fed, he's gaining & doing better. (Very glad, though!)

But what worries me most in this saga is that clearly something is wrong in
that household. Clearly, milk production is not working as it should be, and
that's a problem that can be dealt with. But, as I wrote to Suzanne
privately, something is not right with those parents. I am the LAST person
in the world to jump all over people for lifestyle issues, or cultural
differences, etc., but these parents need lots of guidance and help and
possibly some nurturing supervision, 'cause I think they're missing
something. The system set up by all the helpers, for example, of phone calls
and reporting in at every night feeding, is admirable, but it's only a very
short-term one. And what is wrong in a household where the family has to
have alarms and telephone calls and check-ins from the community throughout
the night, just to get a newborn fed? So it sounds like the baby is doing
better now that it's getting fed, but what will be next? Being "nature
oriented" and "herbal" and "back to earth" doesn't imply impaired judgement,
but this mother's behaviour with this baby really screams to me that
something is badly wrong there. I hope I'm way wrong...

I wish so much that "the system" had a way to truly help families like
this - not separating them, not writing them off as unfit parents, not just
shrugging them off & saying "oh well, it's their choice". Mom & baby BOTH
need to be nourished and "mothered", so she can learn how to do it. Should
be a place where they can be taken in and have "mothering" SHOWN to them, at
the same time as they are being watched over in their care of the baby. And,
sadly, sometimes there are people who can't do it; not saying this is the
case here, as I have no idea, but I've worked with a few. It just breaks
your heart!

Cathy Bargar, RN, IBCLC