I am concerned about the discussion on who is qualified to help mums breastfeed.  It is obvious that we can give more concrete help if we learn the techniques, read the research, study the problem-solving tips.  But I feel that somewhere along the way,  the actual art of counselling and listening skills can get lost among all this theoretical knowledge.
Almost everything I have learned in 35 years of studying with National Childbirth Trust, attending international conferences and study days of La Leche and the Israel Childbirth Education Centre in Israel, spending days observing other counsellors in maternity wards, reading all the books, subscribing to journals and internet forums - everything at some time has been contradicted by the human factor - the mum and baby sitting in front of me with problems that do not fit the theories.

How many of the breastfeeding organizations actually meet and screen applicants before accepting them for training courses? How many keep in touch with their counsellors to make sure they are working according to their ethics and principles?

Occasionally I meet a well-qualified counsellor and after talking to her I ask myself: if I was a young mother confused, exhausted and ambivalent, is she not too agressive, too judgmental, too convinced of the "facts" of breastfeeding to empathise with me at this point?
Would I actually be scared to call her up and tell her I am not going to breastfeeding any more and need help weaning?

When I had my first baby, the most useful help I got for breastfeeding was  1) the cleaner in the maternity ward who had breastfed triplets and just sat with me one night giving me encouragement and 2) the lavatory attendant in the Ladies at the Cumberland Hotel in Marble Arch where I had come off the street with my baby to find a comfortable place to sit and breastfeed and 3) the other mums in my postnatal support group.

Academic knowledge and techniques are essential, but never let us lose the potential for TLC (tender loving care), empathy and the ability to sit and listen sometimes without opening our mouths.

So let us not be snobby about peer support or help given by health visitors or hospital nurses who have "only" done a short in-service course.

Wendy Blumfield
NCT ANT Tutor/BFC
Israel Childbirth Education Centre

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