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Creationist Museum Declares that the 11th Dimension is  Heaven 
Petersburg, KY  (AP)   
String theory has been debunked by theoretical physicists  such as Lee Smolin 
as “it ain’t even wrong” because it can’t be empirically  tested.  But Dr. 
Boyle, staff  physicist at the newly formed Creationist Museum, has recently 
identified the  11th dimension specified in String Theory as heaven.  Boyle is 
best known for his calculations  for “how hot is hell” by using his 
great-great grandfathers law, Boyle’s Law, to  calculate the actual increase in the 
temperature of Hell as the number of souls  there increase.  (We note that there  
has been a particular spike in the temperature of Hell with the growing  
decadence of the world.)   
In string theory, the elementary particles we observe in  particle 
accelerators could be thought of as the "musical notes" or excitation  modes of 
elementary strings.  String theory strongly  suggests the existence of ten or eleven 
(in M-theory) spacetime dimensions, as  opposed to the usual four (three 
spatial and one temporal) used in  relativity.  Research by Boyle and  others at the 
Creation Museum reveals that these extra dimensions are comprised  of the 
following: 
Dimension 5:  Purple Haze 
Dimension 6:  Black Holes (or in earthly terms, Las Vegas, because what 
happens in  Vegas stays in Vegas) 
Dimension 7:  The 7th circle of hell (referred to by Al Qaeda, where bombers  
are united with virgins). 
Dimension 8:  New Jersey 
Dimension 9:  Dark Matter (or Purgatory) 
Dimension 10:  Nirvana 
Dimension 11:  Heaven 
Philosophically, string theory might not be truly  fundamental in its present 
formulation because it is background-dependent: each  string theory is built 
on a fixed spacetime background.  However, Creation Museum scientists  believe 
they will soon find the absolute and fundamental formulation with  further 
research.  Recent  developments in mathematics and logic, such as irrational 
numbers and fuzzy  logic, are instrumental in the new mathematical explanations 
that Creation  Museum scientists are using to support their theoretical  
advances. 
-- Taken from the wire by Bob Russell, Learning  Experience Design, 
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