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Subject:
From:
Donald Satz <[log in to unmask]>
Date:
Sun, 15 Aug 1999 14:57:38 PDT
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Andrew Carlan wraps it up:

>Men have become wimps.

There's much truth in Andrew's assertion, but I think that "confused"
is a more accurate adjective.  Men are in a state of flux.  Our basic
advantages, physical prowess and procreation, are not as significant as
in the past.  Men are being asked to redefine their roles, become more
nuturing and empathetic, and overall, to enter life areas rather alien to
their upbringing.  There are many men who are handling all this very well:
they maintain pride in their physical powers and manly traits while also
developing the other skills necessary to cope well in today's world.  The
majority, however, are very confused as to what directions to take.  Behave
more manly and you might end up in jail and will definitely be called a
neanderthal.  Behave like a caring and empathetic individual and many
people will consider you effeminate, including many females.

I really see only one answer to the problem - self-confidence.  Every
person, regardless of type, needs to have pride and feel comfortable about
their bodies, heritage, developed principles/ethics, goals, etc.  How do
you get there? To some it's just natural - that's my wife.  For others,
practice and life experiences do the trick - that's me.  Unfortunately,
there are large numbers of persons who always have low confidence; what can
they do? Fake it - it works, and the more you do it, the more confidence
you take on.

Connection to music? Well, I've been reading about feeling intimidated by
the "right" folks to follow "acceptable" musical practices and thoughts,
and heterosexuals having a tough time of it getting recognized in musical
circles where gender preferences are paid attention to.  The only thing
combating any of this is a person's self-confidence.  Be yourself, have
pride in yourself, and engage in your life.  And, it seems to me that most
of the folks on this list do just that.

Don Satz
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