On Wed, 20 Dec 1995, Dick Copeland wrote:
> Again I expose my ignorance, but what is the Ezzo method? THe posts make it
> sound like a religious teaching grounded in Christian Scriptures that
> teaches something about regimented feeding times. I don't find anything in
> scripture to support that. Where can I find more?
Hi, Dick! I think it is wonderful that you haven't heard of the Ezzo's
yet. Gary and Anne Marie Ezzo were pastors at John MacArthur's church in
So. California, but a couple of years ago left to put all of their
energies into their ministry, GROWING FAMILIES INTERNATIONAL (GFI). They
have authored several curriculums: Preparation for Parenting, Preparation
for Toddlerhood, Growing Kid's God's Way, plus a new series for Teens and
their Prep for childbirth series. They also have two "secular" books out
reflecting their infant philosphy called ON BECOMING BABYWISE, and now
also ON BECOMING TODDLERWISE. Classes are moderated by approved couples
and require both books and tapes (audio or video) for approved classes.
The foundation of their philosophy is that God is a god of order, and that
we are to be like God in that respect, and that we are to be
"soberminded", as Paul chastised one of the churches. Reflecting this
belief, they believe that the unregimented system of "demand" feeding puts
children in charge of parents, and so they see this as "humanistic"
(which = unchristian in their eyes) and not of God. Instead they embrace
"Parent Controlled Feeding" (PCF), though they have recently changed this
term (I wonder why!), because this puts parents in charge and allegedly
reflects scripture, and therefore God's will.
The Ezzo's infant curriculum structures the baby's day into wake times,
play times, feeding times, etc. Babies are not to fall asleep at the
breast, because then they will become dependent on the breast to fall
asleep, a "bad habit". Babies are not to be picked up when fussing unless
you believe that they have a good physical reason to be fussing; if not,
they are to be ignored and instead told, "be happy"; when they comply,
then parents are to show their approval by responding by picking baby up.
Baby "needs" crib and playpen time so that they can learn to be alone,
learn to play alone, learn to explore "all the possibilities" of the few
toys given them, learn to "fit into" the parent's lives rather than the
parents "fitting in" to the baby's life.
The overriding principle is that babies are "born into 'metabolic chaos'
and need our help in overcoming this" via scheduling (aka structure). They
are seen in the Calvinistic belief of being depraved and self-centered
(there is truth to that, but I disagree with their extrapolations!), and
therefore need to be guided and "disciplined" from birth not to be
self-centered. The parent's relationship is considered primary (which I
can agree with, except again for the extrapolation), and children are to
be shown visibly that mom comes first, ie. dad spends time with mom FIRST
when he comes home, and they are not to disturb them until mom and dad are
done (this is known as "couch time"), so that they understand their place
in the family.
The Ezzo's promote having baby sleep through the night by 6 weeks because
parents "need their sleep and can't function without it", and prescribe
10 hours of sleep or so plus 2 or 3 naps a day, as well as cutting
nursing or bottles back to 3 a day plus one optional bedtime feed by six
months of age. Along the same lines, toddlers are not to snack, but eat 3
regular meals a day "like the rest of the world" (!!!). The reasoning for
no snacks? "It will make them eat better at meals and not bug mom", to
paraphrase. Convenience to the parents is the keyword.
Probably the most disturbing element for me is their belief that a truly
"secure" baby can go to other people and not cry. Babies should be able
to be left in nurseries, should greet other family members happily, etc.,
regardless of age. A child who does not do so is considered "insecure"
and "unsocial". The Ezzo's reject most of psychology as "humanistic", and
do not recognized accepted principles of child development such as
development of primary attachments before secondary, or of the separation
anxiety stage that occurs in the second half year of life.
I could go on and on here, but I've probably said enough for now. The
interesting and sad part is that this curriculum has become divisive in
some churches, where "Ezzo families" become somewhat snobbish and look
down on non-Ezzo families; one family was even ex-communicated for
speaking against it, while other families have left churches over this
curriculum, have lost friendships, have lost family. There is a certain
degree of "righteousness" that is displayed by some of these parents, and
while the claims are that you can raise a child in many different ways
properly, the attitude doesn't match that the words. The breastfeeding
advice is poor and based on old information, but the "godly goals" of
"Christian parenting" are promoted as more important than breastfeeding
to the point that any mother who continues to deviate from the curriculum
in order to make breastfeeding succeed is made to feel that she is
practicing idolatry, putting her child before God. Lots of rigid thinking
here, and when you are able to effectively discard the arguments of
science, other culture's experiences, and psychology, then you have
nothing left in which to fight the curriculum except the Bible, your
interpretation against there's. We all know how tough *that* is. <sigh>
I would be happy to answer any further questions, and hope that this has
given you a good start. It may also be useful to you to know that Moody
Radio has sponsored the Ezzo's on the air show, and that they also travel
around the country doing "parenting" and "moral purity" seminars. Their
teachings have been carried abroad by unwary missionaries, so the impact
really is becoming international. They have also launched their ministry
on Compuserve, so anyone with that service can find them and dig in more
deeply if they wish.
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Lisa Marasco, BA, LLLL, IBCLC
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