> Re: From:    Jeanette Panchula <[log in to unmask]>
> Subject: trusting our bodies - trusting our patients
>
> Having experienced THREE situations in our family in the last year where
> the MDs refused to believe the patient:
>
>
> .  Once she was believed and her pain was
> managed appropriately, her heart problems disappeared.
>
> No wonder there is so much communication difficulty - patients are ignore=
> d,
> so they start believing their symptoms are "in their head" - nipple pain,=
>
> breast pain, etc.  OR they don't believe people will listen so they don't=
>
> report it (I have had to BEG moms to TELL me if the assistance I am
> providing is helping or not).  Some sit stoically and let the baby nurse
> even when I am SURE they are in pain.  Others seem to think: Well, it's
> SUPPOSED to hurt, so I don't want to cause trouble.   =
>

I don't have the details of it, but there was a study done some years ago about
"pain management". One group was told to ignore pain, the other to log it or
otherwise keep track of it, I'm not sure. Guess which group ended up coping better
with the pain, even feeling less pain after a while? I just heard someone on the
radio this morning talk about discussing homesickness with campers, talking about
their feelings so they could "shake hands with the feelings". Shaking hands might
not be the best term for nipple and breast pain, but *acknowledging* pain is
certainly important.Even more so is acknowledging the frustration, fear, worry,
and sometimes anguish that mothers feel when they have problems doing something
half of the people they have talked to has said is impossible and the other half
has said is easy. No, breastfeeding isn't supposed to hurt, but the message
sometimes comes out as: If breastfeeding hurts, it is not going to work. I try to
tell expectant moms that some problems can be prevented, but a lot of them can't,
however, there are solutions. I also spend a lot of time telling them that they
have been through a lot if they are calling on me days or even weeks after the
pain has started. If they cry, I figure I've released a tiny bit of that pain.
When one of my children complains, the first thing I say is "wow, that must hurt."
I'm really pleased that teenagers have taken to commenting, "that must hurt, eh?"
or "that's not fun."
Midwives and doulas often know how to do this kind of thing (acknowledging the
pain, encouraging the woman to work with it and through it rather than against
it).
One of the reasons people give themselves over to birth or death in the wee hours,
I think, is that they are not inclined to fight against what is happening to them.

 Jo-Anne

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