Ruth, I have given up trying to sound "balanced" on the issue of abm vs. breastmilk and that is what I tell folks who ask me. I tell them that as person who is a specialist in human lactation it is difficult for me to use the "f word" and impossible for me to to be unbiased. There are times when abm is useful and I list them (very short list). Presentation is everything, and I work to carry off a lighthanded approach. I explain that it is easy to think of abm as benign, since there are rarely any sudden, shocking results of feeding abm. This opens the door for me to mention long-term health outcomes (for infant and mother). And I add that, before I studied this subject, I thought people like me were on the fanatic fringe--(it gets a laugh.) Of course, somewhere in here I try to discover where they are coming from: is mom exhausted and feeling so-called "relief" bottles will help? is Dad feeling he wants a turn to feed? are relatives or friends telling wonders-of-abm tales? is there a fear of insufficient milk? Based on what I discover, I tailor the information I dispense. Most of the time (and this surprised me at first) parents are very thoughtful and interested in hearing the facts. (I used to believe I would be "making them feel guilty" :-/ ) Linda Smith (aka: the Coach) was the first to give me the confidence to be honest about my biased opinion in a professional setting. (Thank you Linda!) Once I started being honest I found that such discussions naturally became forums for "informed choice." By giving the parents the info that I have (and how many other HCPs have all the facts about abm and human milk as we do?) I feel satisfied that I have empowered the parents to make their own decision. Of course, one has to be accepting and able to support the decision the parents make. By being honest about my views I am able to come away feeling that I did not swallow my "real" feelings--and know I left the decision where it belongs: with the informed parents. Margery Wilson, IBCLC Old enough to be a Granny Zealot Massachusetts Institute of Technology ILCA Region I (New England states) Representative